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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

Silently hoping for a comet to strike, to get out of today’s responsibilities.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

Back to work after the long holiday weekend, so you’re finally away from the relatives you don’t like, and back with the co-workers you don’t like.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

Some people’s high horses are actually donkeys.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

I love traveling because I love to check if I have my passport every 3-4 minutes.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

I love ordering things online because when they arrive it’s like a present from me to me.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

The three people who like every single one of my posts are going in my will.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

If alcohol damages your short-term memory, imagine what alcohol can do.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

If you ever get a chance to date a cute person for one day, where will you take me?

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

It’s so much easier to suggest solutions when you don’t know too much about the problem.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

Don’t be afraid to ask questions during a job interview. It’s the best way to find out if the person you’re interviewing is a good candidate for the job.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,618

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Instagram:

Phone addiction got so bad that watching a movie feels productive.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Don’t let anyone ruin your day. Be a man. Ruin it yourself.

Shared recently on Threads:

I’ve never found a “Remember Me” checkbox that works. Nothing remembers me.

Spotted on Threads:

I need like twelve incomes for this lifestyle I have in my head.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Is it ‘My wife and I’ or ‘Me and my wife’? Anyway, we just robbed a liquor store.

Live now on X:

I hope “be the light you want to see in the world” doesn’t refer to Molotov Cocktails.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Inventor of pink lemonade: yes, exactly the same, but cute and for the girls.

Just shared via Telegram:

If you’re ever intimidated by someone just imagine them opening a Capri Sun.

Trending via X:

If you feel fat and sad just know it’s someone out there fatter than you.

Just shared via TikTok:

Accidentally used men’s shower gel today, and I can already feel myself lying for no reason.

21 Funny feet quotes

Funny feet quotes 🦶😂 are the perfect way to tickle your toes and your funny bone! Whether your feet are tired, ticklish, or just downright silly, these playful lines will have you stepping into laughter. Ready to put your best foot forward with some humor that’s sure to lift your spirits and keep you grounded? Let’s dive into some toe-tally hilarious vibes! 🌟👣🤣

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Social Media Stars ⭐

95 shares on YouTube this month:

To bed then. To bed with you! Guards, take him to my bed!

98 shares on TikTok this month:

Pomegranates are worth the mess.

100 shares on Slack this month:

You should be able to donate somebody else’s body to science.

76 shares on Twitch this month:

Whoever said, “Laughter is the best medicine,” clearly never tried Revenge.

40 shares on Telegram this month:

When someone touches my phone, I automatically turn into a ninja.

94 shares on Slack this month:

When you have intense chemistry with someone, everyone else feels so bleh.

47 shares on Reddit this month:

I got one brain cell left and it moves around my head like a Windows screensaver.

76 shares on Messenger this month:

Architects should try and design a house with no yelling.

52 shares on Instagram this month:

(Talking to myself) I just don’t know what to tell you.

71 shares on Pinterest this month:

Go outside and let the rain do what your boyfriend can’t.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Watering plants qualifies as a hobby.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

You can’t spell disappointment without me.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

At the end of the day, it’s just me and me.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I do not care how bad the relationship is, I am NOT calling a radio station for advice.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Letting her be the passenger princess cause I care about my safety.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I start each day assuming it will be horrible and go from there.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Adulting’s a total scam. Bills, taxes, and a laundry pile that breeds in the dark, were not in the brochure!

17 folks are currently checking 👀

After ten true crime podcasts you start to think you could probably solve a murder. After a hundred you start to think you could probably get away with one.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

“You’re just mad my gut microbiome is way more diverse and complex than yours.”

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Dr. Pepper just unseated Pepsi as the second most popular soda in America. Don’t tell me that getting your PhD isn’t worth it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,337

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

Raise your hand if you’ve ever tried to breathe quieter while walking up a hill so strangers didn’t call 911.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

Who called it a biological clock and not an egg timer?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

You don’t realize how incorrect and annoying YouTube video essays are until they’re about something you like.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

Who needs therapy when you can just cry in a fast-food parking lot.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

I need to know the brand of toothbrush my neighbor has. I hear it buzzing sometimes an hour at a time and she’s clearly enjoying it.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

“I can’t wait to go back to bed tonight!” Me, 5 minutes after waking up.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

Next time I die, I’m going to make sure I’m reincarnated someplace other than Earth.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

Put my too-weak notice in at the gym.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

I have thought one billion times about everything.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

Me: I’m an introvert. Vodka: No, you’re not.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Threads:

Contrary to what we currently believe, we don’t choose afternoon naps. Afternoon naps choose us.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Be the lemon you want the world to hand to others.

Breaking via Threads:

You never realize how many curse words are in a song till you play it for your family.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Nobody told me that when you get a husband the ears are sold separately.

Going bananas on Slack:

The great thing about having a mouse in your house is that I’m sure it’s just the one mouse, probably.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Human stupidity exists because if everyone were smart, we’d have no one to laugh at on the internet.

Live now on X:

Me: Maybe it’s the weed talking but your apartment seems enormous. IKEA Manager: Sir.

Just shared via Twitch:

Ever look at someone and think you could spend the rest of your life saying “What?” to this person?

Spotted on Instagram:

Moose would have been a better name for a cow.

Going viral on YouTube:

I’ve been dieting for a little over a week and I already gained three pounds.

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