11 Funny items quotes

• 

  3 days ago

  Share →: Selling porn is gross, but selling food and small household items is grocer.

  Commentary:
  When the local grocery store tells you to keep your produce covered 🍏🧺😄

• 

  4 days ago

  Share →: “I’m currently not accepting new items on my to-do list.”

  Commentary:
  Looks like my to-do list is in witness protection 😂📝🚫

• 

  3 weeks ago

  Share →: Wow, this is a really nice, sturdy box. I should keep it in the attic for the next 20 years.

  Commentary:
  "Wow, a box with a 20-year retirement plan! 🗃️📦✨ Who knew cardboard could be so future-focused? 😂 #BoxGoals"

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you’re shopping for something else because they just won’t budge.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic 'Nope, I totally needed to examine this random jar of olives right here' maneuver. 🛒😅 Next time, maybe we should bring a dancing distraction to shimmy them out of the way! 💃🕺"

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: You never realize what you have until it’s gone. Toilet paper is a good example.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the wise words of someone who truly understands the value of the little things in life! Who knew that the humble toilet paper could teach us such profound lessons in gratitude and appreciation? Remember, folks, never underestimate the power of a well-stocked bathroom!"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: As I’m cleaning my room, this is a friendly reminder that you actually don’t need that free t-shirt or tote bag from that event.

  Commentary:
  🧹 Ah, the classic dilemma of decluttering: saying goodbye to all those freebies you were so convinced you absolutely needed at the time! 🤦‍♂️ Who knew those event giveaways would multiply faster than bunnies in spring? 🐰 Pro tip: before you know it, they'll multiply totes, shirts, and all! 🛍️ Letting go is tough, but a tidier room is totally worth it! 🌟 #

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Don’t go chasing waterfalls? The place where many video games hide easter eggs and other rare items?

  Commentary:
  "Who needs to chase waterfalls when you can find hidden treasures in the digital realm? 🎮🕹️ Just keep your eyes peeled for those sneaky easter eggs! 🐣💎"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: The sole purpose of some household items is to make it impossible for you to open the damn drawer.

  Commentary:
  Ah, yes, those pesky household items that turn a simple task into a Herculean challenge! 🙄 It's as if they've been imbued with a mischievous spirit intent on thwarting your every attempt to open that drawer. Who knew a seemingly innocuous drawer could become your arch-nemesis? 😂 Next time you conquer that stubborn drawer, consider it a triumph worthy of an epic quest! 🏆✨

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: I’ll never understand people who go through self-checkout line and slowly and carefully scan their items. This line is for stealing.

  Commentary:
  "Self-checkout: where speeding through like a grocery store ninja is the name of the game 🛒💨 Who has time for precision when you can live life on the edge and risk setting off the 'unexpected item in the bagging area' alarm for that adrenaline rush? 😂 #LifeIntheFastLane"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Girl cats get named after ancient goddesses and boy cats get named after Taco Bell menu items.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the eternal feline naming dilemma: Should Fluffy channel the majestic vibes of Athena or embrace the spicy allure of Crunchwrap Supreme? 🐱👑🌮 Decisions, decisions… To goddess or to taco, that is the question! 😹 #CatsVersusTacos"

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