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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

All I do is go to work, come home, blink and suddenly I’m back at work.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

It’s almost time to switch from my everyday anxiety to my fancy Christmas anxiety.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

The new American dream is an alien invasion.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

Sure, I could keep my thoughts to myself but I can’t see “Likes” in my journal.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

Starting a new show sucks. Who are these people?

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

Called off work. Feeling fat and wearing jeans.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you’re up to.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Welcome to your 40s: you’re not having a midlife crisis, you’re just awake.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

Don’t be part of the problem. Be all of it.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

Dear razor commercials, please stop shaving hairless legs. If you want to impress someone, shave a gorilla.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,684

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Show me another rule so I can break that one too.

Making waves on Twitch:

Y’all ever skip a class and then have the post-skip class depression? Like, damn, I should’ve just gone.

Making waves on WeChat:

The older I get, the more I start to understand the appeal of birdwatching as a hobby. I do find myself watching these little troublemakers quite often.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I don’t want to end this year on bad terms with anybody. Could you please apologize to me?

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Jesus rose from the grave because he forgot to clear his browser history.

Just landed via Threads:

I should be able to eat one huge meal a month, like a snake. This every-few-hours shit sucks.

Shared recently on TikTok:

My train of thought derailed. There were no survivors.

Making waves on Instagram:

Instead of likes, we should get a little kiss.

Trending via Facebook:

People argue with me more in my head than they do in real life.

Live now on TikTok:

Everyone’s a gangster until they turn a spoon the wrong way under running water.

1112 Funny people quotes

More funny people quotes 👇

People pleasing doesn’t go well with my black attire.

5 days ago

attire, attitude, black, black attire, fashion, humor, people, people pleasing, pleasing, well
I know so many people with cats, and only a tiny number of them went to a shelter and picked out a cat. Everyone else I know with a cat has a story that’s like, ‘Yeah, he just moved in.’

5 days ago

adoption, animal, animal behavior, behavior, cat, cats, else, everyone, funny observation, humor, i, just, know, moved, number, observation, only, people, pet, pet adoption, pet story, picked, shelter, story, tiny
Many people love saying, “Get these away from me,” after eating a few chips.

5 days ago

after, away, chip, chips, craving, eating, food, humor, love, me, people, reaction, saying, snack
Stay humble and play dumb. People reveal who they truly are when they think they are smarter than you.

5 days ago

behavior, dumb, humble, humor, intelligence, interaction, people, personality, play, play dumb, psychology, reveal, self-awareness, smarter, social, social interaction, stay, think, truly
Fact: Snow in November happens because people decorate for Christmas prematurely. You know who you are. Stop it.

5 days ago

Christmas, decorate, decoration, fact, holiday, humor, know, November, people, premature, snow, stop, weather
Shout out to the people getting $400 hotel rooms on Feb 14th to do the same two positions they do at home.

5 days ago

14th, couple, day, expensive, getting, home, hotel, hotel room, humor, people, position, positions, relationship, room, rooms, same, sex, sex position, shout, travel, valentine’s, Valentine’s Day
Before social media, you had to actively go out and find crazy people.

5 days ago

active, active search, before, crazy, crazy person, humor, impact, life, media, modern, modern life, observation, people, person, search, social, social media, technology, technology impact
Scooby Doo was a woke-ass show. Every villain was just a landlord trying to scare people off their property so they could sell it.

5 days ago

doo, every, just, landlord, people, property, scare, scooby, Scooby Doo, sell, show, trying, villain, woke
Family Guy is so insane because, why were people dating that dog?

5 days ago

animation, dating, dog, family, Family Guy, guy, humor, insane, people, show, TV, TV Show, why
Some people are living bowel movement to bowel movement.

5 days ago

bowel, bowel movement, daily, daily routine, humor, life, living, movement, people, routine

For even more funny people quotes, hit next 👇

All funny people quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

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Social Media Stars ⭐

29 shares on Facebook this month:

Give us this day our daily internet validation.

67 shares on TikTok this month:

I don’t like the person I become when my boss tells me I should be working while at work.

31 shares on X this month:

They always say, there is someone for everyone… unfortunately, the person for me is a therapist.

59 shares on Twitch this month:

I put my bathroom scale in the corner, and that’s where the little liar will stay until it apologizes.

18 shares on Slack this month:

My brain has too many tabs open.

23 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t always push on pull doors but when I do, I do it two or three times to confirm how dumb I really am.

86 shares on Snapchat this month:

Each day on Twitter, there is one main character. The goal is to never be it.

36 shares on Twitch this month:

My life plans are fading like Marty McFly’s family photo.

94 shares on YouTube this month:

Don’t worry. Artificial intelligence will never replace actual ignorance.

88 shares on X this month:

Going to look at the small picture for a while. Tired of seeing the big picture. Too much picture.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

I need to find hobbies that don’t include my debit card.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

I often got called “an old soul” and such like by adults when I was a child. I think this was a kind way of saying I was a sad little freak.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

Happy Earth Day. You don’t look a day over 4 billion years and get hotter every year.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

It’s never too early to start making bad decisions.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

Maybe the reason you haven’t found your soulmate is because you don’t have a soul.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has downloaded:

Have nothing to say, I just wanted to appear in your newsfeed.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

My bad if I ever left you on read. I didn’t mean to open the message.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

Please stop assuming that too many em dashes mean AI written. Some of us are producing grammatically incoherent work the honest way!

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

Live, laugh, leftovers.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

A song that hits so hard it makes you want a cigarette.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

I remember when my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? And I told him everyone knows he doesn’t hire stupid people.

Shared recently on Reddit:

To all the people with grammatical issues, don’t worry, I also have problems with badly timed periods.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Anyone else’s phone make a retching noise when you unlock it with Face ID?

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Love how Batman: The Animated Series seems to take place in the 40s and the 50s and the 70s and the 90s all at once.

Making waves on Facebook:

Found a picture of me sitting on Santa’s lap. Hard to believe it’s been a whole year.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I nearly broke my toe because the coffee table didn’t look where it was going.

Trending via Twitch:

Your pronouns should be get/help.

Just shared via Threads:

I need someone to wring out my brain like a dishrag.

Just shared via X:

In the 90s, you’d always find your way to some stranger’s house.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

A girl, her bed, and TV series on a Friday evening is a true love story.

Activity Log ✨

1112 Funny people quotes

More funny people quotes 👇

All funny people quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

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