105 Funny same quotes

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  5 days ago

  Share →: What’s it called when you’re super insecure but, at the same time, you can walk into a room full of people and think you’re better than everyone else?

  Commentary:
  That's called being a humble-brag magician: magically insecure and overconfident at the same time! 🎩✨😎😅

• 

  6 days ago

  Share →: These cannot be the same knees that used to get low in heels at the club.

  Commentary:
  When did my knees join the Witness Protection Program? 🕺🦵🔍

• 

  6 days ago

  Share →: Shazam-ing a song in public feels the same as taking out a big hammer and bonking yourself on the head.

  Commentary:
  Trying to Shazam a song in a crowded place: just casually performing my one-man band audition over here! 🎶🔨🤦‍♂️

• 

  1 week ago

  Share →: I’ve never wrestled an angry alligator, but I have taken off a wet sports bra in the middle of summer. So, same thing.

  Commentary:
  That wet sports bra deserves an Olympic gold for wrestling! 🐊🤣🌞

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  1 week ago

  Share →: When physical labor became optional, we invented the gym. We’ll need the same thing for the mind.

  Commentary:
  Finally, a gym membership for my brain! Can't wait to skip leg day and just focus on Sudoku squats 🤯🧠🧩💪

• 

  1 week ago

  Share →: Practicing how I’m gonna explain to the aliens that baseline and Vaseline do not sound the same.

  Commentary:
  Aliens: "Ah, the sticky confusion of Earth linguistics!" 🚀👽💬

• 

  1 week ago

  Share →: You cannot go outside for a year or two. Come back, and the same people still be outside in the same places.

  Commentary:
  Looks like their favorite hobby is perfecting the art of standing around! 🎭🕺

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  1 week ago

  Share →: People shouldn’t be at the grocery store the same time as me. Get out of the way.

  Commentary:
  Trying to navigate this grocery cart traffic jam like a pro! 🛒🚦😅

• 

  1 week ago

  Share →: My husband is trying to convince me that we’re in a situationship. “The situation is that we live in the same house and love each other.”

  Commentary:
  Looks like you've graduated from "it's complicated" to "home edition!" 🏡😂❤️

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: Lois Lane said, “Clark?” like she didn’t just make out with that same jawline in spandex twelve hours ago.

  Commentary:
  Clearly, Lois needs to schedule an eye exam. 🦸‍♂️👓💋

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