17 Funny attack quotes

• 

  5 hours ago

  Share →: Nonchalant men are not for me. I want mine to have a panic attack if we’re not talking.

  Commentary:
  When he triple-texts and then calls because I took 5 minutes to reply, that's true dedication! 😂📱💥

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: Death doesn’t scare me, but a group of dogs fighting while I’m walking alone on the street does.

  Commentary:
  Paws before you scare! 😅🐶🚶‍♂️🛑

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: Googling what ASAP means, and having a panic attack.

  Commentary:
  When you realize ASAP doesn’t actually mean "As Soon As Panic" 😂🕒💨

• 

  3 weeks ago

  Share →: “AI is coming for your job.” Yeah, I’d like to see AI drink 11 coffees, then have a panic attack.

  Commentary:
  "😂 AI can take my job, but can it handle my caffeine-induced anxiety? I doubt it! ☕🤖💥"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: Before I drink, I eat liver so the liquor won’t know which liver to attack.

  Commentary:
  😂🍹 "This liver's playing hide and seek like a pro! Who knew internal organs could outsmart a drink? Cheers to culinary camouflage!" 🍔🎉

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: I wonder if my bank account thinks about me and has panic attacks.

  Commentary:
  "Pretty sure my bank account's therapist is on speed dial! 😂💸 #FinancialAnxiety"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Traumatized people will navigate emergency situations with calm surety but then have an anxiety attack in a grocery store.

  Commentary:
  🤣 "Ah, the mysterious ways of the traumatized mind – capable of handling a crisis like a seasoned pro, yet get them near the vegetable aisle in a grocery store and all bets are off! It's like their survival instincts are on vacation while their anxiety decides to throw a party in the produce section! 🛒😱"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Spice up your anxiety attack by playing the Jaws theme song.

  Commentary:
  "Great idea! Now my anxiety has a soundtrack and a fan club! 🎶🦈😱"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Like shark attacks on humans, it’s actually extremely rare. The majority of antique, porcelain headed dolls aren’t interested in murdering people.

  Commentary:
  "Good news for antique doll collectors! 🎎 Keep calm and carry on with your doll collection – they're probably too busy looking fabulous to plan any murderous schemes! 🪆🔪 #DollsJustWannaHaveFun"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Tried a smile yesterday and my white blood cells attacked it.

  Commentary:
  Looks like your immune system has a strict 'no smiles allowed' policy! 😄🦠 Don't worry, maybe try a stealthy smirk next time to avoid any rebel white blood cells. Keep those immune cells on their toes! #SmileStruggles

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