48 Funny couple quotes

• 

  3 days ago

  Share →: Looking for someone to take to couples therapy and see how long it takes the therapist to notice we don’t know each other.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew speed dating had a sequel? 😂👩‍❤️‍👨🏃‍♂️🏃‍♀️ #TherapistsNightmare #StrangersInTherapy"

• 

  7 days ago

  Share →: Let’s lay on the couch together, play on our phones, and ignore each other, babe.

  Commentary:
  "Couples who scroll together, roll together! 📱❤️ #RelationshipGoals 😂"

• 

  3 weeks ago

  Share →: It’s okay to get rid of the boxes for the electronic things you’ve had for the past couple of years.

  Commentary:
  "Finally permission to let go of my 'museum of ancient tech boxes'! 📦✨ #BoxHoarderNoMore"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: Current relationship status: sleeping diagonally across the bed.

  Commentary:
  When your bed becomes a personal version of Tetris! 🛏️😴😂

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: We hate the same people and it’s so romantic.

  Commentary:
  "Couples who roast together, toast together! 🔥😂❤️"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: There’s something so romantic about getting McDonald’s with a lover. Intimate perhaps.

  Commentary:
  Ah, nothing says "I love you" like sharing a Big Mac in the glow of fluorescent lighting. Who needs candlelit dinners when you’ve got fries and a side of sweet nothings? 🍟❤️😂 #FastFoodRomance #McLove

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: If I learned anything in college, it’s that pepper spray only stings for a couple hours.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the timeless wisdom of college life – where painful lessons are learned both in and out of the classroom! 🌶️🎓 Remember, folks: knowledge is power, and pepper spray is just a temporary inconvenience! 😅 #CollegeLifeLessons

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Third wheeling with two girls who are best friends is so much worse than third wheeling a couple.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the classic third-wheel dilemma! 🚴‍♂️ Being the uninvited guest at the best friend’s brunch is like trying to enjoy popcorn in a firework show—sure, you're there, but you're definitely not the star. 🍿🔥 Sometimes, third wheeling feels more like being the awkward punctuation in a love story—necessary, but often misunderstood. 😅 Still, hey, at least you're getting a front-row seat to comedy at its finest! 🎬😂

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: If you ever need me, I’m always just a couple missed calls and text messages away.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the modern-day Morse code of friendship: missed calls and unread text messages! 📱😄 Don't worry, I'll be there in spirit, just a few notifications away! 🚀📵 #FriendshipGoals"

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: “Excuse me, are you gonna finish those fries?” Me, interrupting a couple fighting.

  Commentary:
  "Excuse me, are you gonna finish those fries? 🍟 Who needs love when you have crispy golden goodness! 😂 #RelationshipGoals #FriesBeforeGuys"

For even more funny couple quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny couple quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌