Funny hire quotes

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  1 month ago

  Share →: They should invent a job that actually wants to hire you after you apply.

  Commentary:
  "Is there an app for instant approvals yet? Asking for a friend… and their resume. 🤔🧑‍💻📄"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I think I can now safely say that none of my co-workers were “personality hires”.

  Commentary:
  Looks like the hiring process at your workplace is all about talent and not just about having a great personality 🌟. No room for "personality hires" here! 🚫😂 #SkillsOverSmiles

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I was thinking of becoming self employed, but due to cutbacks, I can’t afford to hire me right now.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like the boss (aka YOU) is not feeling so generous with the budget lately 🤷‍♂️ Maybe it's time for a performance review with some self-reflection? 😅💼 #DIYBoss"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: My wife refuses to hire a housekeeper because she doesn’t want them to see this mess.

  Commentary:
  Looks like the mess is on a strict need-to-know basis only! 🤫🚫 Who knew secrecy was a crucial element in housekeeping? 😂🧹 #TopSecretMess

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: My company promotes diversity. We’d never hire twins.

  Commentary:
  "Sorry twins, you'll have to take turns applying at this company! We're all about unique individuals here 😉👯‍♂️ #NoTwinningAllowed"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I need to hire someone to just constantly slap food out of my hand.

  Commentary:
  "Why hire someone when you can just develop a self-slapping mechanism? 🤚🍔 It's the ultimate diet plan – guaranteed to keep those midnight snack cravings at bay! 😂 #HandSlapDiet"

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