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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

Taking a dog named shark to the beach is a bad idea.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

The cool thing about ignoring a notification is being surprised to see it over and over again.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

The universe consists of 5% protons, 5% neutrons, 5% electrons, and 85% morons.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

If your name is “Guy”, you have lazy parents.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

The people that sing their heart out, but terribly, are my people.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

WhatsApp calls should indicate whose internet is poor to avoid unnecessary arguments.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

If I got a Dollar for every time I thought about you, I would start thinking about you.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

I got so lost there for a minute (several years).

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

You’re all badass until that dust bunny in the corner is a real spider.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

I wish you could put your whole life on do not disturb.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2136 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,298

Funny Quotes Topics

15,021

Funny Quotes Images

12,298

2 minutes ago

3,446

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

The perfect number of cats is two stupid cats. Preferably siblings. But they can’t both be the same type of stupid. One needs to be stupid (dumb) and one needs to be stupid (annoying).

Trending via Reddit:

Unlike smoking, vaping doesn’t reduce your sex drive. It just reduces the sex drive of the people who see you vaping.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

How do I un-know people?

Breaking via Messenger:

Australia is like someone’s still playing Jumanji.

Breaking via Discord:

Notice how ghosts never wear fitted sheets?

Just landed via YouTube:

When people block me, I just assume it’s for my rugged good looks and killer jawline.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

My search history is filled with me googling regular words just to make sure I’m using them right.

Shared recently on Reddit:

For security reasons, I highly recommend that you leave one of your children home during the holidays to set elaborate booby traps in case of intruders.

Live now on Threads:

Just give your kids the iPad. They’re the ones who’ll be fighting cyborgs in the future.

Just shared via Snapchat:

The people that sing their heart out, but terribly, are my people.

Home » Funny History Quotes

60 Funny history quotes

Funny history quotes 🤓📜 are the perfect blend of wit and wisdom, offering a delightful peek into the past with a humorous twist. Imagine famous figures sprinkling their conversations with cheeky remarks and clever observations 😂. These quotes remind us that history wasn’t always serious 🏛️; it had its fair share of laughs too. Dive into the lighter side of history and enjoy a giggle while learning something new 🤭!

New funny history quotes 👇

52 minutes ago
Share →: Oxygen was discovered in 1773. How did our ancestors breathe before then?

Commentary:
Can't believe they spent so many years holding their breath! 😂💨
1 day ago
Share →: First date idea: we search for each other’s criminal history together.

Commentary:
Swipe right to "who's more wanted" 😂🔍❤️
2 days ago
Share →: Kids: making things way more difficult when they don’t have to be, since the dawn of man.

Commentary:
Trying to unlock the mysteries of the universe while spilling cereal everywhere, since forever 😄🍎🥣
4 days ago
Share →: Grateful to be living in the “Tetris when it’s going too fast and blocks are helplessly piling up” era of human history.

Commentary:
Sounds like we need the cheat code for life before hitting the high score 🤔🕹️ #StackingUp
5 days ago
Share →: Maybe Rome was built in a day. I wasn’t there.

Commentary:
I can barely build a sandwich in a day, so I'm skeptical 🍕⏳🏛️
2 weeks ago
Share →: First World War. Kind of nervous.

Commentary:
I hope they had a solid WiFi signal in the trenches to Google "how to win a war" 📡🔍💣
2 weeks ago
Share →: I see why history can repeat itself. People are really stupid.

Commentary:
And here I thought déjà vu was just for sci-fi movies! 🤦‍♂️🔄📜
2 weeks ago
Share →: The first time people saw a train coming at them, they ran away in terror.

Commentary:
I guess they didn't have "train-ing" for that back then! 🚂😱😂
2 weeks ago
Share →: Should we all just give up and get really into drugs? Wait, this is literally what happened in the 60s. That just clicked for me.

Commentary:
When life gives you lemons, make… psychedelic lemonade? 🍄🍋✨
4 weeks ago
Share →: I’m sick of living through history!

Commentary:
"Same here! Can we just skip to the part where we win a lifetime supply of vacation days? 😅🏖️📜"

For even more funny history quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny history quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2136 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,298

Funny Quotes Topics

15,021

Funny Quotes Images

12,298

2 minutes ago

3,442

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

Be the elephant you wish to see in the room.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

Most people think that T-Rexes can’t clap because they have short arms, but really it’s because they are dead.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Work from home ain’t for everyone. I, for one, hate when my coworkers try to message when I’m shopping.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

Horoscope: Many good things are in store for you! Unfortunately, the store is closed for repairs.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

Apparently “ew no” is not an acceptable way to tell my boss I don’t want more responsibility at work.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

Before sleeping, most people will imagine stuff they want to happen. Like sleeping.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the holiday traffic I said I’d avoid even though I did nothing to avoid it.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

The haters said I couldn’t do it. And they were correct. Honestly, great call from the haters.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

A man rejecting my advances can’t hurt me. I have a dog who leaves the bed every time I climb in.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

I could never journal, I’d start lying in there too.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I listen to a lot of white noise, so I get really excited when it rains or someone turns on a fan. It’s like seeing my favorite band live.

Live now on Messenger:

Whenever I’m willing to sell my soul, there’s usually food involved.

Just landed via WeChat:

When you said “let’s circle back to that in the new year” and now it’s the new year.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I thought my wrinkles were finally getting smaller, but it turns out my eyes were just getting worse.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Dracula had it right, sleep all day, live alone in a castle and explode into a thousand bats to get out of social situations.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%

Going viral on TikTok:

First date idea: unlock and switch phones with the other person for exactly two minutes and if no one is horrified then the date continues.

Breaking via Snapchat:

It’s a shame that the know-it-alls know everything better but don’t do anything better.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

My superpower is holding onto stuff for years and throwing it away exactly one week before I need it.

Just shared via Facebook:

I’m shocked it offended you, I was certain someone was gonna need to explain it to you.

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