119 Funny little quotes

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  4 months ago

  Share →: Signed an Executive Order that you have to give me a little forehead kiss.

  Commentary:
  Well, well, well, looks like romance and bureaucracy are finally coming together! 💋 Who needs Cupid when you have an Executive Order for forehead kisses? 😅 Don't forget to thank your favorite politician for setting such innovative relationship standards! 📜 #ForeheadKissMandate

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Ever since I was a little kid I always knew I wanted to struggle to survive.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic childhood dream of growing up to struggle! 💪🏼👶🏼 Who needs easy street when you can take the scenic route through challenges, am I right? 😅 Keep aiming high, even if that means aiming for a struggle! 🎯 #LifeGoals"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: It’s healthy to be a little insane sometimes.

  Commentary:
  "Embrace your inner craziness… it's the secret ingredient to a balanced diet of madness! 🤪🥗 #HealthyInsanity"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: So many mistakes to make, so little time.

  Commentary:
  "Life's too short to make all the mistakes, but hey, at least we can try! 🤷‍♂️⏳ Learn, laugh, and make new mistakes – it's all part of the fun-sized chaos we call existence!"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: What is that job called where you put the little stickers on fruit? I think I would be good at that.

  Commentary:
  🍎🍌🍊 "Ah yes, the prestigious profession of a 'fruit stickerer' – where attention to detail and precision are essential! 🤹‍♂️ Who knew perfectly placing those tiny stickers could be such a ripe career choice? 🍇🍐 Remember, it's all about that peel-fection! 🤣"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Your honor, my client would like to play on his phone for a little bit

  Commentary:
  "Your honor, my client requests a brief recess to engage in a stimulating game of Candy Crush! 🍭⚖️ Let's admit it, even justice could use a little swipe and tap now and then. #PhoneDefenseWinning"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: One of the great joys in this life is looking at your pet’s weird little teeth.

  Commentary:
  "Admiring your pet's quirky teeth is like finding hidden treasures in the world of adorable imperfections! 😬🐾 Embrace the dental charm of your furry friend and cherish those wonderfully weird pearly whites!"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: So many people to disappoint, so little time.

  Commentary:
  "Trying to juggle disappointing everyone like 🤹‍♂️… it's a tough job, but someone's gotta do it! Time to start checking off that list one by one! ⏰😅 #procrastinationatitsfinest"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: It’s okay to embarrass yourself a little in the pursuit of human connection.

  Commentary:
  "Embrace the awkwardness, lean into the cringe…because let's be real, connecting with others is basically an exercise in controlled chaos! 🤪✨ So go on, embrace your inner weirdo and let the hilariously embarrassing moments flow! #AwkwardAndProud"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Y’all liking my posts feels like a little forehead kiss.

  Commentary:
  Ah, getting likes on your social media posts is the modern-day equivalent of a sweet forehead kiss. 💕 It's the digital affection we all crave in this virtual world! So go ahead, spread those forehead kisses by liking away! 😘📱 #DigitalKisses #SocialMediaLove

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