Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

My housemates are convinced our house is haunted. I’ve lived here for 274 years and not noticed anything strange.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

The best way to get through Monday is to pretend it’s Tuesday.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

If I were an organ, I’d fail.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

Let’s draft everyone who has their phone on military time first, since you’re all so eager.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

Dear people who talk on speakerphone out in public. Everyone around you hates you.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

If you ever see me out in public, just know I don’t want to be there.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

Sorry, I can’t today. I have to sit in my room and make matters worse.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

I just want someone who will treat me like a lady and hold the refrigerator door open for me.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Do people who do triathlons know that they don’t have to?

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

There are only two portion sizes for mashed potatoes: nowhere near enough (posh restaurants) or far, far too much (literally everyone else).

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

676 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,805

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Threads:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re always sleepy unless you’re trying to get to sleep.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Let’s all be grateful for a moment that stupidity is not contagious.

Spotted on Twitch:

My mayor is Muslim, my bagels are Jewish, my Dior is Christian.

Broadcasted on Discord:

If I’m ever the problem, you’re the reason.

Spotted on Instagram:

Used dark mode so much that I became physically repulsed when I see a white screen.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I don’t wanna brag, but I’ve been told I’m micro-management material.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

My wife and I always eat dinner as fast as possible so we can have a popsicle.

Trending via Instagram:

A funny thing about the Heimlich Maneuver is that it’s impossible to pronounce if you’re choking.

Making waves on X:

The trash gets picked up tomorrow. Be ready.

Spotted on Messenger:

Strange new trend at the office. People putting names on food in the company fridge. Today I had a tuna sandwich named Linda.

83 Funny video quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

38 shares on Instagram this month:

That “never again” talk with yourself after a certain experience is always funny.

70 shares on Slack this month:

You ran a half marathon? That’s really cool, I’ve almost finished a bunch of things, too.

72 shares on YouTube this month:

Who develops the algorithm? I want to speak to the manager.

18 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Only in America can a kid wear $150 shoes, sip a $8 coffee, and post from a $1,200 phone about being oppressed and claiming capitalism has failed them.

72 shares on Pinterest this month:

Used dark mode so much that I became physically repulsed when I see a white screen.

10 shares on Messenger this month:

Behind every funny man is a woman who rolls her eyes.

77 shares on YouTube this month:

A sandwich has the power to change your entire life.

23 shares on Twitch this month:

Sometimes I watch people do their jobs, and I’m like, damn, you might benefit from a little imposter syndrome, actually.

90 shares on Instagram this month:

Girl math is deactivating social media accounts to avoid only one person.

21 shares on Messenger this month:

For whom the doom scrolls!

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

No need for a Halloween costume this year because there’s nothing scarier than being in your mid-20s and not knowing who you are or what you want to do anymore.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

Christmas decor isn’t meant to be sleek and minimalist, it is supposed to look like joy threw up in your house.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

Let’s all be grateful for a moment that stupidity is not contagious.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

Plot Twist: Your taxes cheated on you.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

Remember when the FBI would threaten you at the beginning of every VHS tape? That was pretty cool.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

You ever got inside jokes with yourself, or is that schizophrenia?

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

There is a reason I’m single and it’s called my face.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

Let’s tell the truth cell phone. I don’t have six missed calls. I have six ignored calls.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

Adulthood is saying “but after this week things will slow down a bit” over and over until you die.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

Thinking of starting a true crime podcast. Gotta explain this search history somehow.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Reddit:

If you want to hang out with me, all you have to do is ask, and I’ll say no.

Just shared via YouTube:

Sorry, I didn’t text back. I don’t like talking to people anymore.

Making waves on WeChat:

But if i put my laundry away, the laundry chair will be out of a job.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

My rapper name would be 2 stressd.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Ah coffee. The sweet balm by which we shall accomplish today’s tasks.

Making waves on Instagram:

Stop asking a clown why he keeps acting like a clown, ask yourself why you keep going to the circus.

Spotted on X:

I’m going to hell in every religion.

Going viral on X:

Humans are just chaos wrapped in meat, going bananas on caffeine.

Just landed via Telegram:

Corporate life requires an ass-licking skill set I simply wasn’t born with.

Breaking via Threads:

Future generations will never have to live in unprecedented times, because we’re precedenting the Hell out of everything right now.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

83 Funny video quotes

More funny video quotes 👇

Seeing yourself on a FaceTime screenshot really humbles you.

Waving at the end of every Zoom call like it’s the 1800s and a big steamship is leaving the harbor.

I feel like Mario has more raw prowess, but Luigi is probably the more sensual lover.

Have you ever been in the car with someone who drives like we got extra lives?

You know when you tap a video to see how long it’s got left? I wish you could do that to people while they’re talking.

You guys ever play a game for hours straight? You start hallucinating the sounds.

Seems like the ‘how to use a fire extinguisher’ video on YouTube shouldn’t have a 30-second ad before it.

Not sure what’s longer: a microwave minute or watching a video while someone else is holding the phone, insisting it’s hilarious.

Nudes are outdated. Send me a video of you reading out loud so I know you’re not dumb.

All funny video quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨