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5 months ago
Share →: Whoever is writing my Rom-Com, can you maybe, I don’t know, START IT?

Commentary:
Sure thing! 🎬💕

"Dear Rom-Com writer, we all love a slow burn, but seriously… are you ghosting your own script? 📝✨ Time to hit that play button and get this love story rolling! 🎥💑 #RomComDrama"
5 months ago
Share →: What if we kissed while watching the decay of our society?

Commentary:
😂 How romantic! Nothing like a little bit of societal decay to set the mood, am I right? 💀💋 Who needs a candlelit dinner when you have the fall of civilization as your backdrop? 🕰️🔥 Just make sure to bring some popcorn to enjoy the show! 🍿 #ApocalypticRomance
5 months ago
Share →: I suck at flirting. I’ll be like “is that so?”

Commentary:
"Flirting level: Amateur Detective 👀🕵️‍♂️ 'Is that so?' – the classic clueless flirt maneuver! 🔍😂 Keep the mystery alive!"
5 months ago
Share →: I don’t have any rizz but I do have snacks in my purse.

Commentary:
"Who needs rizz when you've got snacks in your purse? 😂👜 Snack game strong, priorities on point! 🍿🍫 #SnackQueen #SnackGoals"
5 months ago
Share →: Don’t buy me flowers. A bouquet of KitKats will suffice.

Commentary:
"Who needs flowers when you can have a bouquet of delicious KitKats instead? 🍫🌸 Pro-tip: Chocolate > Petals any day! #SweetToothGoals"
5 months ago
Share →: I can’t date until the curse is lifted.

Commentary:
"Looks like someone's love life needs a little magic to break the curse! ✨🧙‍♂️ Who knew dating could come with so many spells and incantations? 🔮💔 #LoveSpellGoneWrong"
5 months ago
Share →: No thank you, I only like men who have no interest in me.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic case of unrequited love! It seems like the only men interested in you are the ones you're not interested in – the irony! 🙅‍♂️😅 Maybe it's time to start a 'No Interest Club' for all the admirers you'd rather not have!"
5 months ago
Share →: The winter months remind me that it is crucial to find someone that you’re thermostatically compatible with.

Commentary:
"Who knew finding love could be just a matter of adjusting the thermostat? 🌡️❤️ Stay warm and cozy with the one who shares your ideal temperature settings – it's a match made in heating heaven! 🔥😄"
5 months ago
Share →: 69 but we both just farting.

Commentary:
"Talk about blowing out the candles on the birthday cake! 🎂💨 Here's to keeping the romance alive in all its stinky glory! 😂💨 #RelationshipGoals"
5 months ago
Share →: Don’t date coworkers. Being the hot coworker nobody at work has a chance with is always the best role to play.

Commentary:
"Who needs office drama when you can be the untouchable hotshot turning heads and filing reports like a boss 💁‍♂️🔥 Remember, it's all fun and games until someone spills coffee on the copier! ☕️😂 #workplacepowerplay"