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85 Funny drinking quotes

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2 months ago
Share →: You don’t need to leave a message in a bottle. If the bottle is full of tequila, I’ll get the message.

Commentary:
"Who needs a message in a bottle when you can have a bottle with a message 🍹📜? Tequila has a way of making sure that message gets through loud and clear! Cheers to a truly effective communication strategy! 🎉😄 #TequilaTalks"
3 months ago
Share →: “You’re always drinking wine!” God forbid a girl enjoys the first miracle of Jesus.

Commentary:
"Exactly! I'm just trying to channel my inner Jesus vibes, one sip at a time 🍷😇 #WineWednesdayMiracles"
3 months ago
Share →: Men used to go to war, now they drinking matcha.

Commentary:
"From battling foes to sipping green tea lattes, oh how the times have changed! 🍵💪 Are we witnessing a peaceful revolution or just a matcha addiction in the making? 😄"
3 months ago
Share →: I’m never drinking again, unless something is going on later today.

Commentary:
"Promises made after a night of regrets and headaches! 🍻😅 #JustOneMoreTime #TheStruggleIsReal"
3 months ago
Share →: Establish dominance at work by drinking iced tea in a wine glass.

Commentary:
"Because nothing says power move like sipping iced tea from a wine glass at the office 🍷💼 Boss level: expert! Who needs a corner office when you've got a fancy glass, am I right? 😄 #TeaGoals"
3 months ago
Share →: My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror.

Commentary:
Well, that's one way to follow the doctor's orders! 🍹🪞 Who knew self-reflection could be so intoxicating? Maybe the real question is: does the mirror judge your choice of cocktail? 🤔😄 Remember, it's all about perspective… and a good sense of humor! Cheers to seeing eye to eye with yourself! 🥂✨
3 months ago
Share →: Sometimes I tell myself I should stop drinking so much, but I’m not about to listen to a drunk who’s talking to himself.

Commentary:
"When your inner drunk advisor gives you advice, you know it's time to pour another drink 🥃🤔 #CheersToQuestionableWisdom"
3 months ago
Share →: Some people spend a fortune so they can circle the world. I drink some beer and the world circles around me.

Commentary:
"Who needs a passport when you have a cold brew in hand? Let the world come to you, one sip at a time! Cheers to the ultimate staycation."
4 months ago
Share →: My wife asked me why the bottle of wine we bought yesterday was half empty. I said because she is a pessimist.

Commentary:
"Looks like his wife sees the glass half empty… or in this case, the bottle half empty! 🍷😂 Maybe he should try a 'glass half full' approach next time!"
4 months ago
Share →: Drinking coffee because throwing chairs at people is frowned upon.

Commentary:
☕️ "Sipping on that coffee like a civilized adult because trust me, throwing chairs is so last season! 😝 Who knew caffeine could prevent a potential furniture-throwing incident! Keep calm and drink coffee, folks!" ☕️