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Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฎ has bookmarked:

So many true crime podcasts are just like โ€œa young woman went missing, the police took a week to respond, she was last seen with a man the community call Creepy Steve, he has never been questionedโ€

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡น has downloaded:

What is that job called where you put the little stickers on fruit? I think I would be good at that.

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No one told me adulting would involve trying to avoid so many scams.

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For as long as that song was, youโ€™d think the Ghost Busters would have mentioned their phone number at least once.

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Are there any medium rappers? They’re always Big or Lil.

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You want me to sit in the back seat? The thing that killed JFK?

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If you’re soft, don’t come to my house, cause my kids will roast you.

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Whoever said “team work makes the dream work” needs to explain that to my many personalities.

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You tell people you’re not trying to drink and they act like you just turned down 100k.

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I just canโ€™t watch football, thereโ€™s too much โ€œpenetration in the backfieldโ€ for me to not giggle like an immature maniac.

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Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ช has bookmarked:

Real introverts are too introverted to tell people theyโ€™re introverts.

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Clearly, hell is empty, the demons are all here.

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Introverts be like “I know a place”, then go home.

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Just drafted the drunk text I’m going to send after one drink this weekend.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ด has shared:

I can’t believe I forgot to go to the gym today. That’s like 7 years in a row now.

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They say we learn from our mistakes. That’s why I’m making as many as possible… I’ll be a genius soon.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ฎ has copied:

Adulthood is basically just trying to fall asleep at night and stay awake during the day.

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Tornadoes are the most relaxing things in the news.

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โ€œIโ€™m like Sisyphus but with dishes. Dishyphus.โ€

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ has shared:

Don’t tell me that everything was better in the past. I was there.

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