116 Funny self-deprecating quotes

• My signature move is me looking for my phone that I’m currently holding in my hand.

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  4 weeks ago

  awkward, comedy, everyday, forgetfulness, hand, holding, humor, looking, me, move, phone, relatability, self-deprecating, signature, smartphone, tech

• I have many talents, all equally un-monetizable.

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  4 weeks ago

  comedy, humor, i, sarcasm, self-deprecating, talent, un-monetizable

• Not to brag, but I can put my socks on without sitting down.

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  4 weeks ago

  brag, casual, everyday, everyday life, humor, i, life, put, self-deprecating, sitting, sitting down, socks

• I love being a pretty woman because it widens the threshold for cringe-worthy things I can say.

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  4 weeks ago

  being, confidence, cringe, humor, humor quote, i, love, pretty, say, self-awareness, self-deprecating, things, threshold, vanity, woman, women

• I’m not good with plants or people, but I am good with books and buffets.

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  4 weeks ago

  am, books, buffet, food, good, hobby, humor, humor style, i, people, plants, self-deprecating, style

• I thought my wrinkles were finally getting smaller, but it turns out my eyes were just getting worse.

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  4 weeks ago

  aging, eye, eyes, eyesight, getting, humor, i, joke, just, perception, self-deprecating, smaller, thought, worse, wrinkle, wrinkles

• If you think my posts are horrid, wait until you see the live stream of my colonoscopy.

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  4 weeks ago

  awkward, colonoscopy, embarrassment, humor, live, live stream, medical, medical humor, posts, self-deprecating, stream, think, unexpected, wait

• I have no idea how people meet at the gym. I turn into a disgusting, angry swamp witch every time I exercise.

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  4 weeks ago

  angry, attitude, disgusting, every, exercise, fitness, fitness struggle, funny attitude, gym, gym life, humor, i, idea, life, meet, mood, people, self-deprecating, struggle, swamp, time, turn, witch, workout, workout mood

• I hate to brag, but I’ve been the biggest mistake of numerous people’s lives.

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  4 weeks ago

  brag, confidence, hate, humor, i, mistake, sarcasm, self-deprecating

• I am so lucky that I can’t tell the difference between a heartfelt compliment and sarcastic disdain. Life is much easier when you’re dumb.

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  4 weeks ago

  am, compliment, difference, disdain, disinterest, dumb, easier, humor, i, ignorance, irony, life, luck, lucky, much, sarcasm, sarcastic, self-deprecating, simplicity, tell

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