Funny quotes wine

36 Funny wine quotes

Funny wine quotes add a humorous twist to your favorite glass of vino! 🍷😂 From witty remarks about wine o’clock to playful observations on the joys of sipping, these quotes capture the lighter side of enjoying a good drink. Cheers to a laugh and a fine bottle! 😄🍇

Establish dominance at work by drinking iced tea in a wine glass.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

I love airports because the rules of society don’t apply. Eat a pizza and have a glass of wine at 7 am while in track pants. Nobody cares.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

I’m not religious, but if someone is turning water into wine, let’s take a second look.

Funny Quotes Mar 17, 2025

My wife asked me why the bottle of wine we bought yesterday was half empty. I said because she is a pessimist.

Funny Quotes Mar 14, 2025

I always cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food.

Funny Quotes Feb 25, 2025

Need to clean the fridge, so I’m going to do the responsible thing and drink wine instead.

Funny Quotes Feb 22, 2025

My nutritionist told me wine doesn’t count as a fruit source so now I need to find a different nutritionist.

Funny Quotes Feb 9, 2025

A peaceful transition of power happening between me and this red wine just now.

Funny Quotes Feb 2, 2025

Anyone know which wine pairs well with societal collapse?

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

I’m 45% coffee, 40% wine and 6% cheese.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

Always keep a bottle of wine in the fridge for special occasions. Like Wednesday.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

It was so windy today when I was walking to the gym that I got blown into the wine store.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

I can turn wine into water about two hours after drinking it. Checkmate Jesus.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Someone asked me how much I spend on a bottle of wine. 30 minutes was not the right answer.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

It’s this time again when you have to choose between coffee and mulled wine in the morning.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Someone asked me how much I normally spend on a bottle of wine. Answering “usually an hour” wasn’t the right answer. I know this now.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Combining breakfast and lunch: Brunch. Combining wine and dinner: Winner.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Wine shopping is 10% grape variety and 90% “ooohh, this one has a pretty label.”

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Wine must breathe. I always hear that wine needs to breathe. I want to drink it and not revive it.

Funny Quotes Jan 25, 2025

If I ever go missing, please print my picture on wine bottles and not on milk boxes. My friends are more likely to find me then.

Funny Quotes Jan 25, 2025

I enjoy a glass of wine each night for its health benefits. The other glasses are for my witty comebacks and flawless dance moves.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

If I could turn water into wine, I’d have lots of followers too.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

I let my cat smell every wine I drink so she can get a job as a sommelier and help pay my rent.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

The most I’ve ever spent on a bottle of wine is about 45 minutes.

Funny Quotes Jan 23, 2025

When you drink red wine from a cup, it looks like fruit tea and you are also admired by others for your healthy lifestyle.

Funny Quotes Jan 23, 2025