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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

“Mom, how did we get so rich?” your father said, “Thanks, nothing from my end,” on thousands of important Zoom meetings.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

Things went well until the evil supermarket people hid my favorite products in new places.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

Don’t be alarmed at my semicolon usage; I’m a professional.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

Forget tequila, I’m at the age where you can wake up with a hangover from Netflix.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

The day they handed out patience, I left because it was taking too long.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

This is my emotional support online shopping cart.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

Apparently there is a bird fight club who holds their meetings outside my window at about 5am.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

The ideal girlfriend breaks your heart, so you go on to do great things.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

If you don’t like sports, you are missing a whole world of easy-going conversations with complete strangers.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

I haven’t posted a selfie in a while, but I’m still very cute. Just to keep you updated.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

3 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,710

Funny Quotes Topics

15,369

Funny Quotes Images

12,710

8 minutes ago

3,438

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via X:

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep, not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

Just shared via X:

I’ll be honest. I can’t solve your problems. What I can do is create new, bigger problems that will make your current problems seem quaint by comparison.

Breaking via TikTok:

If you see me out in public but we haven’t talked since high school, let’s keep it that way.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I just tried on my summer wardrobe. The only thing I managed to get into was a state of panic.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I heard God is testing both of us at the same time. Wanna hang out?

Reported on Facebook:

There’s no way the Scooby Doo gang never found a dead body.

Just shared via Slack:

Why do plane tickets have to be so expensive? You’re literally going that way anyway. Just give me a ride.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

I’m currently trying not to read anything about carbohydrates after 4pm.

Trending via LinkedIn:

It’s getting slide guitar and harmonica hot outside.

Breaking via Reddit:

Adulthood is realising no one cares about you, and the show must go on.

Home » Funny Bathroom Quotes

78 Funny bathroom quotes

Funny bathroom quotes add a humorous touch to one of our most private spaces! 🚽😂 From witty comments about bathroom habits to playful observations on the quirks of toilet time, these quotes bring a smile to the everyday routine. Enjoy a laugh as you embrace the lighter side of bathroom moments! 😄🛁

New funny bathroom quotes 👇

7 hours ago
Share →: IP address? You mean the bathroom?

Commentary:
When the tech support says "IP conflict," and you're just trying to avoid a bathroom queue! 🚽😂
5 days ago
Share →: Centaurs can’t wipe their asses.

Commentary:
Who knew the real reason centaurs run so fast was toilet paper avoidance? 🏃‍♂️🧻💨
5 days ago
Share →: Going to the bathroom at night with my flashlight on and a dog next to me feels like I’m gonna solve a mystery.

Commentary:
Ready to crack the case of the midnight munchies with my trusty sidekick, Scooby-Doo! 🐾🔦🔍
2 weeks ago
Share →: I hate when I change the battery in the bathroom scale, and it starts telling the truth again.

Commentary:
Sounds like my scale is jacked into a lie detector… 🤥🔋➡️🤭📏🚫
2 weeks ago
Share →: What do you even say when someone knocks on your bathroom stall … like, what’s the protocol?

Commentary:
Knock knock, bathroom edition: who's there? Occupied! 🚪🙈🛁
2 weeks ago
Share →: Life tip: If all of your bathrooms are full and you’re waiting for someone to finish, just turn off the WiFi in the house.

Commentary:
Cut the WiFi, and watch the bathroom lines clear faster than a free pizza announcement! 🍕🚀💨
2 weeks ago
Share →: If you pretend you’re erasing the evidence of a murder while cleaning the bathroom, you’ll do a better job, and it actually becomes fun!

Commentary:
Channeling my inner crime scene investigator while scrubbing away! 🚿🕵️‍♂️🔪 Who knew bathroom cleaning could be such a thriller? 😄
2 weeks ago
Share →: I have to stand in the shower about this.

Commentary:
Trying to solve life’s mysteries one shampoo bottle at a time 🚿🤔🛁
2 weeks ago
Share →: Behind every strong, independent woman… is a dog that follows her to the bathroom.

Commentary:
Proof that even strong women can't shake their loyal bathroom buddies 🐾🚪🤣
2 weeks ago
Share →: Make sure you bury me near a bathroom because death is long, and I’m sure I’ll still have to get up and pee.

Commentary:
Finally, a valid reason to haunt the living: bathroom breaks! 🚽👻

For even more funny bathroom quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny bathroom quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

3 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,710

Funny Quotes Topics

15,369

Funny Quotes Images

12,710

8 minutes ago

3,461

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

It’s not that I want more shoes, it’s just that they keep making them in my size.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

That uncle or aunt who kept their distance from the rest of the family will start making more sense as you get older.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

It’s like 10,000 yawns when all you need is a nap.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Ever look at someone and think you could spend the rest of your life saying “What?” to this person?

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

I am so incredibly tired today. I think my shelf life has expired.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

69 but we both just farting.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

A clever man fills his wife’s closet with so many clothes that no other man can fit in.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

Hey man, be careful on the trampoline, one of my buddies never came back down.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

Handshakes should be banned. Touch our naked body parts together for all the world to see? Gross!

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

Husband and I were blissfully happy for 25 years. Then we met.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Scooby-Doo led me to believe that if I were ever really scared, I should run super-fast in place.

Breaking via Instagram:

I used to have this mental illness, where I thought logical arguments would change someone’s mind.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

I think I could actually generate electricity with how irritated I get sometimes.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Interviewer: So why do you want this job? Me: I don’t. I just need money.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

After weeks of using an anti aging cream, I can now proudly say: I now have very well-maintained wrinkles.

Just shared via Pinterest:

The question of whether an employer values its employees is sometimes answered by the toilet paper.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Coffee doesn’t solve all my problems. But it definitely stops me from constantly creating new ones.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Only difference between me and someone in a psych ward is I’m outside.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I may look fine on the outside, but on the inside I’m hungry again.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I just got lied to by 3K+ people. That recipe was awful.

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