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17 Funny broken quotes

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1 month ago
Share →: Bluesky honestly feels like a miracle where you take the most annoying people in the world and stick them in a broken elevator together.

Commentary:
"Sounds like a social experiment ready for a sitcom! 😂🚪🔧"
3 months ago
Share →: Take a broken girl, fix her. And she will go back to the same guy again.

Commentary:
"Trying to fix a broken person and expecting a different outcome is like trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. 🤦‍♀️ Maybe it's time to upgrade to someone who comes pre-assembled! 😉🔧"
4 months ago
Share →: Having children is like living in a frat house – nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.

Commentary:
"Having children is basically like being the president of a frat house – except you can't resign, the messes are smaller but smellier, and the parties never end. Cheers to parenthood, where sleep is a distant memory and throwing up is just another rite of passage!"
5 months ago
Share →: Lasagna has never broken my heart. Just saying.

Commentary:
"Lasagna stays loyal and cheesy through thick and thin! 🍝💔 No wonder it's the ultimate comfort food, always there for you when pasta-bilities seem endless! 😂👌"
5 months ago
Share →: You can make friends in a doctor’s waiting room as long as you have something broken and not something coughing.

Commentary:
"Who knew a broken arm could be the ultimate icebreaker while waiting in the doctor's office? Just don't try bonding over a sneeze symphony, that's a friendship killer for sure! 🤕🌡️😷"
5 months ago
Share →: All I’m dealing with is broken people. Lord, if I’m a mechanic, please tell me.

Commentary:
Oh, looks like someone signed up for the repair shop of life without knowing it! 🔧😅 Well, at least you're getting some hands-on experience in fixing broken souls. Just remember to stock up on some extra wrenches and a good sense of humor! 🤖😄 #LifeMechanic
5 months ago
Share →: I haven’t broken a mirror lately, but my water broke and I’ve had seven years of kids crawling into my bed.

Commentary:
Oh, so that's the new formula for seven years of bad luck? 😂 Sounds like you've upgraded from just breaking mirrors to breaking waters! 🤰👶 Better stock up on those extra-large bedsheets! 🛏️ #ParentingStruggles
5 months ago
Share →: I used to work at McDonald’s and we only told ugly people that the ice cream machine was broken. So I have bad news if you were ever denied ice cream.

Commentary:
"Well, if you were told the ice cream machine was broken at McDonald's, you might want to take that as a compliment in disguise! Who knew getting denied ice cream could be a subtle flattery? 🍦😂 #IceCreamDiscrimination"
5 months ago
Share →: I’ve already broken all my resolutions and like four commandments.

Commentary:
"Who needs resolutions and commandments when you've got charm and wit? 😏 It's all about living on the edge and breaking the rules with style! 😜🔥 #RebelWithACause"
5 months ago
Share →: Even a broken shrimp fries rice twice a day.

Commentary:
"Well, at least that broken shrimp is keeping busy with some gourmet meal prep! 🍤🍚 Who knew shrimp could double as a chef? 😂"