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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡Έ has shared:

I’ve decided to cut my carbs… into smaller pieces before eating them.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡¬ has shared:

Today my coworker asked if I wanted to hold her new baby and neither of us were prepared for me saying why?

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡° has viewed:

I love when I come home, I put on my Adam Sandler clothes.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡― has viewed:

Sometimes our greatest achievement in life is being able to survive our own thoughts.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡· has copied:

Forgetting how to clean the dishes and shooting them with a gun.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡± has downloaded:

My mouth moves faster than my survival instincts.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ώ has bookmarked:

The thing I’ve always found tricky about money is knowing how much I should have.

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡Ό has viewed:

It’s almost time to pack away the black summer clothes and unpack the black winter clothes.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡΄ has shared:

Oh, lord. I brought my mouth with me to work today and it’s all sass. Prayers, please.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡΄ has downloaded:

Making a grown man kiss his camera on Facetime.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

2386 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,548

Funny Quotes Topics

15,227

Funny Quotes Images

12,548

Updated

22 minutes ago

Users Online

3,463

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Going viral on YouTube:

I want to be gangsta but my grandma said no.

Shared recently on YouTube:

People will name their dog Steve and have two kids named Buddy and Rocket.

Making waves on Facebook:

DMs full of guys who wouldn’t know what to do with me.

Just landed via X:

No revenge, but I hope you stutter every time you try to dirty talk with someone.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Y’all need to stop marrying people who look just like you do but with a wig on.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Screw you guys, I’m gonna go make friends with the crows.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Hmm, that’s a bit too harsh. Let me put “lol” at the end of it.

Seen just now on Discord:

You know what goes great with helping your kid with math homework? Vodka!

Just shared via YouTube:

Nothing you want to do has a timeline.

Trending via X:

I want to be rich enough where I’m not offended by the price of beef jerky.

Home Β» Funny Comparison Quotes

183 Funny comparison quotes

Funny comparison quotes are all about those moments when comparing things makes life way more entertaining! πŸ€”πŸ˜‚ Whether it’s comparing yourself to a superhero, comparing coffee to your personality, or just noticing how ridiculous some comparisons are, these quotes show how humor can be found in the most unlikely side-by-side moments. Let’s laugh at the comparisons we never saw coming! πŸ˜†πŸ“ŠπŸ’₯

New funny comparison quotes πŸ‘‡

For even more funny comparison quotes, check out the next page, if available πŸ‘‡

All funny comparison quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes πŸ‘Œ

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! πŸ˜‰βœŒοΈ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. πŸ˜‚πŸ’₯

Trending Funny Quotes πŸ“ˆ

Hot Funny Quotes πŸ”₯

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

2386 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,548

Funny Quotes Topics

15,227

Funny Quotes Images

12,548

Updated

22 minutes ago

Users Online

3,442

Funny Quotes of the Month πŸš€

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡² has bookmarked:

You cannot trust me at a zoo because I’ll release the animals.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡© has copied:

Relationship tip: Make sure you’re the crazy one.

Someone from πŸ‡«πŸ‡² has viewed:

There’s someone in our team who behaves horribly to me and whenever I have to type his name, I’ve taken to using a slightly smaller font size than for everyone else’s.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡Ύ has copied:

“My reading glasses would look good on your nightstand.” -Me, flirting.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡΄ has downloaded:

If Facebook has taught us anything it’s that a lot of people aren’t quite ready for a spelling bee.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡¬ has copied:

My age is news to me every single time I remember.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡΄ has viewed:

β€œThe average CEO reads 52 books a year.” Yeah, because they’ve got nothing else to do.

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡¨ has viewed:

Everyone thinks they’re brave right up until a goose starts chasing them.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡² has shared:

I truly wonder what it sounded like when Medusa washed her hair at night.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡¦ has copied:

Self-discipline is tough because I’m the boss of me, and that guy runs a real loose ship.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Seen just now on Reddit:

Adulthood is really discovering half your family is mentally ill.

Trending via X:

Hey man, be careful on the trampoline, one of my buddies never came back down.

Just landed via Snapchat:

If it weren’t for the last minute, I’d never do anything.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Having little kids is great because I love spending hundreds of dollars each week to feed my floor and my trash can.

Trending via Instagram:

If you haven’t tried blindfold archery, you should give it a go. You don’t know what you’re missing.

Just landed via TikTok:

The earlier you wake up, the more time you have to think about why you wish you were still asleep in bed.

Seen just now on Facebook:

You know you’re an introvert when you want to go home before even leaving the house.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Someone told me I wasn’t thinking clearly, as if that’s even an option.

Making waves on Reddit:

My teen being nice to me is getting really expensive.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I don’t want to sound controversial, but having Monday off is great. We should do this every week.

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