Funny destroy quotes

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  3 weeks ago

  Share →: If I say, “First of all,” run away, because I have prepared peer-reviewed research, data, and charts, and I will destroy you.

  Commentary:
  "Brace yourself! 😅 My PowerPoint game is stronger than your Wi-Fi connection! 📊🚀 #NerdAlert"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I thought you are the sunshine of my life, but you are just a meteor trying to destroy my world.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like this meteor needs to learn some manners and stop crashing your sunshine party! 🌞🌠 Better grab some galactic sunglasses for this drama!"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: If we all club together we could raise enough money to buy Monday and have it destroyed.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew Monday was up for sale? 😂 Let's gather our funds and bid adieu to that troublesome day! 💸🔨 #MondayNoMore"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: If I had money, my life would be pretty much the same, but my dogs would destroy much nicer stuff.

  Commentary:
  "If I had a dollar for every time my dogs chewed something they shouldn't, I'd probably just buy them more expensive chew toys to destroy! 🐶💸🤷‍♂️ #LifeWithDogs"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: I like listening to true crime podcasts while I clean my bathroom because I can pretend I’m destroying evidence.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew scrubbing toilets could be so suspenseful? 🚽🕵️‍♀️ Just be sure to dispose of that DNA evidence properly! 🔍💼 #cleaningcrimescene"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Lord of the Rings is a story about a brave little Hobbit on a mission to destroy a ring and save the world, and his annoying friend Frodo.

  Commentary:
  "Lord of the Rings: A tale of a pint-sized hero with a golden heart and his unexpected travel buddy, Frodo – the ring bearer, the forever hungry, and the undisputed champion of 'worst travel companion ever' 🌟🍔 #AdventuresOfFrodoAndHisPersonalSpaceBubble"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: For this Halloween I’ve trained my eyebrows to leap off my face and destroy those who’ve angered me.

  Commentary:
  "Beware of eyebrow attacks this Halloween! 👀🎃 Don’t mess with someone who has trained their brows for battle. 😂 #EyebrowRevenge"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: For Halloween I will go to the beach dressed as a french fry and let the seagulls destroy me.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic 'French Fry Sacrifice' costume – a brave choice indeed! 🍟🎃 Just be sure to watch out for those seagulls with a taste for salty snacks. Who knew Halloween could be so adventurous? 💀🌊"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Relationships: Because sometimes destroying your life is a two person job.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the joys of teamwork! Who knew that setting your life on fire could be a joint effort? 🔥👫 Just like Bonnie and Clyde, but with more emotional baggage… and less bank heists. 💔😅"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: “Never let someone else destroy your stuff when you can destroy it yourself”, every kid I ever.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the wise philosophy of every kid ever: 'If it's gonna get wrecked, let *me* wreck it first!' 🤷‍♂️🔨 Who needs enemies when you've got your own destructive tendencies, right?"

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