20 Funny hearing quotes

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: My husband needs a hearing aid, but refuses to get one because it’s the key to our happy marriage.

  Commentary:
  "When selective hearing is the real secret to a happy marriage! "

• 

  3 weeks ago

  Share →: Imagine hearing the ice cream truck music, but at night.

  Commentary:
  "That's when you know even the ice cream has a curfew! "

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: Cats hear everything. They just don’t care.

  Commentary:
  "When you tell your cat a secret and they silently judge you instead of offering advice. "

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Randomly hearing your favorite song is more satisfying than putting it on yourself.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the sweet serendipity of life's DJ spinning your jam without you even asking for it! It's like the universe saying, "Surprise! Here's your favorite tune on the house!" Who needs a playlist when you have cosmic music playin' tricks on ya? #MusicalMagic

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: Hearing my voice in recording makes me wanna apologize to every person I talked to.

  Commentary:
  "Listening to my own voice in a recording has me reconsidering my life choices and contemplating issuing a blanket apology to everyone who's ever heard me speak… #SorryNotSorry"

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: I can’t wait until I’m old enough to pretend I can’t hear.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the joy of selective hearing in old age – the ultimate superpower! Can't wait to conveniently 'miss' all those requests and responsibilities #SeniorCitizenPerks"

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: My superpower? I can look you right in the eyes while you’re talking and not hear a single word you said.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the incredible superpower of selective hearing! Who needs invisibility when you can tune out like a pro? Next stop, the superhero Hall of 'Conversations I Pretended to Follow'! "

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: Day 12 without chocolate: Lost all hearing in my left eye.

  Commentary:
  "Day 12 without chocolate: I didn't know my left eye could even hear, let alone choose to go on strike over chocolate! Must be holding out for the good stuff."

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: Talking to animals doesn’t make you crazy, hearing them talk back does.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew the real issue was not in talking to animals, but in expecting a response back? It's a fine line between Dr. Dolittle and Dr. Delusional!"

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: I cannot hear a word you are saying if your hoodie strings are uneven.

  Commentary:
  "Sorry, can't focus on your words when your hoodie strings are throwing off the whole harmony! #FashionOverFunction"

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