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  • Without freedom of speech we wouldn’t know who the idiots are.

    Commentary:
    “Let’s give a round of applause to freedom of speech for unveiling the hidden gems of idiocy 🤪👏 Express yourself, folks! It’s the only way we can spot the ‘geniuses’ in disguise 😉🎤 #SpeakUp”

  • Listen, before I had my coffee I didn’t know how awesome I was going to be today either.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the magical transformation coffee brings – turning mere mortals into unbeatable superheroes of the morning! ☕️💪 Embrace the power of caffeine and unleash your inner awesome – you got this!”

  • Whoever said money can’t buy happiness simply didn’t know where to go shopping.

    Commentary:
    “Whoever said money can’t buy happiness clearly never wandered down the aisles of a shoe sale! 👠💸 Retail therapy is a real thing, folks! 💁‍♀️🛍️ #ShopTillYouDrop”

  • If you know karate, you shouldn’t have to pay for stuff.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the age-old question: Can martial arts skills double as a form of payment? 💸💥 Just imagine casually busting out a roundhouse kick at the checkout counter – ‘payment received!’ 😂 Who knew self-defense training could save us some cash! 🥋💰”

  • It’s a myth that we only use 10% of our brain, but I definitely know people who use less than that.

    Commentary:
    “Rumor has it we only use 10% of our brain power, but let’s face it, some folks out here living in that 5% range 🧠🤷‍♂️. Maybe they’re saving the rest for a rainy day! ☔️😂”

  • That moment when you finish watching a TV series and you don’t know what to do with your life any more.

    Commentary:
    📺 “When you reach the end of a TV series and suddenly realize your entire existence was just a season finale plot twist… What now? Do we just start the series all over again or take up a new hobby like extreme ironing? Decisions, decisions! 🤔😅”

  • If you want to know what God thinks of money, look at the people he gave it to.

    Commentary:
    Ah, the divine comedy of wealth distribution! 💸🤔 It seems God has a mischievous sense of humor when it comes to choosing who holds the purse strings. Perhaps money is the ultimate test of character! 😉💰

  • I live in my own little world. But it’s ok, they know me here.

    Commentary:
    “Living in your own little world is not a problem when you’re the beloved Mayor of that world! 🌍🤣”

  • You know you’re mature when you go to the dentist and you are no longer afraid of pain, but of how much it costs.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the moment of truth at the dentist’s office: the fear shifts from the pain of the procedure to the pain in your wallet! 💸😬 But hey, at least you can laugh about it… to avoid crying! 😂”

  • My parents think they know me.

    Commentary:
    “Well, well, well… Parents, the ultimate experts on all things ‘You’. 🧐👪 Don’t they know you better than you know yourself? 🤔 Time to add ‘mind-reader’ to their resumes! 🤣 #ParentalPerceptions #TheyGotThis”

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