Funny quotes position

Funny position quotes

My body is like an elastic band – no matter how I stretch it, it goes back to the nap position.

2 months ago

My favorite sex position is any of them. I’m just glad to be involved.

3 months ago

I don’t assume anything except the fetal position.

3 months ago

An evil genius rising to a position of power is bad but it makes sense at least. Feels insulting we’re constantly seeing evil idiots doing it instead.

3 months ago

My yoga instructor was drunk today. Put me in a very awkward position.

3 months ago

Remember when you could lay in one position for hours, now you have to rotate like a rotisserie chicken every 15 minutes or a hip hurts.

3 months ago

So far, no one has seriously tried to bribe me, which is a shame because I am extremely corrupt. Maybe I need a position with more power.

3 months ago

Thinking about stepping down from being an adult, I’m just not in the right headspace for this position right now. I really appreciate the opportunity though.

3 months ago

Companies post open positions online and then ask you why you applied to them.

3 months ago

I only went to medical school to figure out where your arms are supposed to go when you sleep and they didn’t even teach us that.

3 months ago