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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

Pinterest algorithm is like a loving dad who fills the whole fridge with oranges after seeing you enjoy one.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

I’m at the age where I consider any picture of me taken in the last ten years “current.”

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

If you say something while exhaling smoke, it is 10 times more profound.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

“Nah.” – everyone with an office job, from the Monday after Thanksgiving until January 2nd.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

Me, telling my kids we’re leaving in 30 minutes: We’re leaving in 5 minutes.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

How do I get one of those fake corporate jobs where I work remotely, get paid for responding to one email a day, and have a laptop on with Outlook or whatever open?

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Once you realize I’m an idiot, my posts start to make a lot more sense.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

The most realistic scene in Star Wars was when Darth Vader lost his cool during a staff meeting and used the force to choke a coworker.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

I don’t have kids or a dog. What can I bring into a bar that will make everyone mad?

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

I always set two alarms, one for “Good Intentions Me” and one for “The Real Me”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,469

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WeChat:

Eating watermelon and minding my own business.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Aliens are gonna be super confused when they show up threatening to overthrow our leaders and we’re all stoked and offer to help.

Going bananas on Twitch:

The goth urge to live in a haunted Victorian estate and be feared by the townspeople.

Shared recently on Threads:

I just sneezed next to my computer and the anti-virus popped up.

Going viral on X:

I think fathers lose their mind a little bit when they realize their daughters aren’t as forgiving as their wives.

Making waves on Telegram:

Day 12 without chocolate: Lost all hearing in my left eye.

Making waves on Messenger:

Some people are wise, some folks are otherwise.

Just landed via X:

Kid, I have jeans older than you.

Just shared via X:

Snakes don’t hiss anymore, they call you babe, bro, or friend.

Going bananas on Telegram:

I’m at the age where an uncomfortable bed will have me injured for a couple of days.

20 Funny reluctance quotes

Funny reluctance quotes bring a hilarious twist to those moments when you just *don’t* want to do something 🙈🤷‍♂️. Perfect for sharing on days filled with procrastination or when you’re simply not in the mood to adult 😅📅. Get ready to laugh at the art of saying no without actually saying it! 😂✨

New funny reluctance quotes 👇

For even more funny reluctance quotes, hit next 👇

All funny reluctance quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

36 shares on WeChat this month:

Wake up, the thinking isn’t going to overthink itself.

51 shares on Snapchat this month:

Our parents used to drop us off at school with no water bottle, no phone and no snacks, yet somehow we survived.

57 shares on Facebook this month:

I need to have a ginger ale about this.

41 shares on Reddit this month:

Normalize ending a hang-out abruptly by saying ‘I wanna go home now’ and then going home.

20 shares on YouTube this month:

Sometimes you just need a Saturday to sleep all day and do absolutely nothing.

23 shares on Facebook this month:

What’s wrong with the people who come to visit on Sundays? Don’t they have a couch?

56 shares on Threads this month:

Little do my friends know they’re healing me every time we hang out.

96 shares on Instagram this month:

“Why does my back always hurt?”, I say, while never sitting upright in a chair.

17 shares on X this month:

Long-term relationship? Like Tom and Jerry?

89 shares on Snapchat this month:

I say “long story short” and then tell the story with bonus features.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

The sweet spot is just enough pain to know you’re alive, but not quite enough to wish you were dead.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish I loved exercise as much as I love napping 3 times a day and eating 5 times the suggested serving size.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Shout out to the people getting $400 hotel rooms on Feb 14th to do the same two positions they do at home.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Donnie Darko was also ahead of its time because the guy’s haunted by a giant Labubu.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Just read the Ten Commandments for the first time and you can’t do shit with your neighbor.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Boyfriends sound cool and all, but unfortunately, I enjoy not talking for days at a time.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

No, I’m not depressed. I’m sure there’s just something wrong with the planets or stars or something.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

When I like a woman, I start to gather gifts for her like a squirrel hoarding nuts.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t want to brag but I found a recipe online, and then within three weeks not only made the recipe, but closed the tab on my browser.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Why read the room when you can leave the room?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,364

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

Are cassette tapes considered classical music yet?

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

Twitter is cigarette for the eyes.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

Just thinking how many animals we had to ride on before we realized horses were ok with it.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

October is the situationship of months. So briefly beautiful, but you know the horrors are imminent.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

Teaching myself ukulele! Neighbor keeping the beat on my wall!

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

One day my sanity went out for smokes and never came back.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

If humanity is so smart, how come it took thousands of years after the wheel was invented for someone to put them on a suitcase?

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

Your honor, my client doesn’t like jail.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

When people give me directions and they’re like “you can’t miss it,” I’m like, “Oh, you do not know what I’m capable of.”

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

Before we all die from nuclear war or a global climate crisis, can we get a little alien invasion as a treat.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

One day you’re young and carefree and the next, you’re preheating the bathroom before you go in for a shower.

Just shared via Pinterest:

You can always tell it’s Monday because nobody’s smiling.

Breaking via Slack:

Having Christmas off in the middle of the work week and then forcing us to go back to work the next day feels so illegal.

Making waves on WeChat:

Telling her parents you creampie her daily is socially unacceptable. But telling them you’re trying for a baby is a cause for celebration.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Does anyone know how to lower the difficulty setting on my life?

Seen just now on Discord:

Welcome to your 40s, where the hair shows up uninvited and looks pissed to be here.

Breaking via Telegram:

Dry January is out. Sopping Wet February is in.

Shared recently on YouTube:

No one suddenly needs anything more than a kid whose mom has just sat down and gotten comfortable.

Just landed via TikTok:

“Autophagy” would be a beautiful name for a girl.

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