Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

It is a mistake to say that the people who live a hundred years from now will have nothing to laugh at. They can laugh at us.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

My company promotes diversity. We’d never hire twins.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

Whoever said “out of sight out of mind” never lost a spider in the bedroom.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

Grok just sounds like something that might try to eat me.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

Just because the deodorant says 48 hrs, it does not mean you have to challenge it.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

Can’t believe we stayed up and screamed “Happy New Year” for this shit.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

Confuse a restaurant manager today by telling her how good the service was.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Wanted to report a YouTube video, but there is no option for “Cringe”, so I just picked “Terrorism”.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

I disagree with my politics.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

Why hasn’t Lululemon created a bra-line named Lulumelons?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

826 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,988

Funny Quotes Topics

13,932

Funny Quotes Images

10,988

16 minutes ago

3,423

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Snapchat:

One year older today, and still no closer to growing up.

Just landed via WeChat:

She is so narcissistic that her narcissism has narcissism.

Making waves on WeChat:

“New recipe” is code for “less content, but worse ingredients”.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Diet Coke is just a fridge cigarette.

Live now on Reddit:

I miss you (the money I spent).

Making waves on TikTok:

One minute you’re young and carefree. The next minute you can feel in your knee when it starts to rain.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Sometimes I tell myself I should stop drinking so much, but I’m not about to listen to a drunk who’s talking to himself.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Me watching any modern ad: How is this ad an ad for the thing it’s an ad for?

Freshly posted on YouTube:

As a student, the most comforting words you’ll ever hear are “I haven’t started either.”

Shared recently on Telegram:

My wife is pretty excited about going away this weekend so I’m not sure she knows I’m coming with her.

Home » Funny Taking Quotes

24 Funny taking quotes

Funny taking quotes bring a splash of laughter to everyday moments 😂✨ Whether you need a quick mood boost or a clever way to lighten the vibe, these witty gems have got you covered! From playful jabs to clever comebacks, get ready to share smiles and spark joy with words that tickle your funny bone 🤣💬. Dive in and let the laughter begin!

New funny taking quotes 👇

1 week ago
Share →: Why can’t they use deep fake technology for good instead of evil? Like taking Zoom meetings for you, stuff like that.

Commentary:
Finally, a use for deep fake technology that saves us from the 'Can you hear me now?' struggle! 🤔🤖💼
1 week ago
Share →: My mom asked me where I’m taking her to eat on Mother’s Day. I told her we have food at home.

Commentary:
When your wallet's on a diet but your mom isn't! 🍽️😅🍕
1 week ago
Share →: Someone taking your parking space at your own home is a different type of anger.

Commentary:
When it comes to home parking wars, it's tow away or the highway! 🚗💥😠
2 weeks ago
Share →: The opposite of “taking candy from a baby” is “putting sunscreen on a toddler.”

Commentary:
"BRB, off to invent the SPF 100 toddler wrangle-proof sunscreen! 😅👶🧴 #MissionImpossible"
3 weeks ago
Share →: The day they handed out patience, I left because it was taking too long.

Commentary:
"Patience? I left that department faster than my WiFi during a storm! 😂🚶‍♂️💨"
2 months ago
Share →: Taking a sip of beer and letting out a big “ahhhh” so the pregnant lady at the pool next to me knows what she’s missing.

Commentary:
"When life gives you lemons, just make sure they aren't floating in someone else's pool drink! 🍺😆🤰 #PoolsidePerks"
2 months ago
Share →: Taking a guy from skinny jeans to linen trousers, that’s my way of giving back to society.

Commentary:
"Transforming hipsters one wrinkle-free leg at a time! 😂👖➡️👖 #LinenLove"
2 months ago
Share →: The key to a healthy relationship is taking turns being the sad one.

Commentary:
"When your partner's having a meltdown, it's your turn to hold the ice cream and the tissues! 🍦😢😂"
2 months ago
Share →: Taking my heart off my sleeve, I fold it up neatly and carefully place it back inside my chest.

Commentary:
"Ah, the old heart origami trick! Just don't turn it into a paper airplane. ✈️❤️🤣"
2 months ago
Share →: Taking a phone to school in primary was like smuggling drugs.

Commentary:
"Back then, sneaking in a phone felt like we were on an undercover mission! 🎒📱😎 #SecretAgentVibes"

For even more funny taking quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny taking quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

826 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,988

Funny Quotes Topics

13,932

Funny Quotes Images

10,988

16 minutes ago

3,423

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Getting paid 26 times in 365 days is not my destiny.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

As a kid, I was worried about randomly disappearing into the Bermuda Triangle forever. As an adult, I’m wondering how I can actually make that happen.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

There’s a guy who thinks he’s going to Yale, but it’s jail.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

I’m at the age where drinking a cup of coffee now makes me feel like Popeye scarfing down a can of spinach.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

Forgetting how to clean the dishes and shooting them with a gun.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

Plot twist: a Mission Impossible movie where the mission is in fact impossible.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

Don’t suffer in silence. Make it everyone’s problem.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

We don’t make people walk the plank like we used to.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

Promising I won’t tell anyone your secret doesn’t include my husband. He’s basically my diary.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

Instead of writing letters, let’s wait a week before texting each other back so it still feels like it.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

I did a little research on why weekends are only two days long and it turns out people made that up. WTF, people?

Just landed via Pinterest:

You’re all using your crystals wrong. Put them in a sock and start swinging.

Just shared via Reddit:

My day starts backwards, I wake up tired and I go to bed wide awake.

Spotted on Threads:

Aura is the real business card.

Spotted on Slack:

I’ve heard that some people have kids who sleep through the night and I’d like to know if they use tranquilizers or chloroform.

Just shared via TikTok:

People keep inviting me to stuff. I miss the pandemic.

Breaking via X:

When you scream into your pillow, the memory foam never forgets.

Reported on TikTok:

My two moods are eating a breakfast sandwich or wishing I was eating a breakfast sandwich.

Making waves on Reddit:

I can admit that I am intrigued by people weirder than I am.

Just shared via Reddit:

People that tell us what sex gods they are, what do you want us to do with that information?

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All fights retarded. 🤪

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴