154 Funny anything quotes

• My mother always told me, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, say nothing at all.” Needless to say, I’m not much of a conversationalist.

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  1 week ago

  advice, always, anything, communication, conversation, conversationalist, humor, me, mother, much, nice, nothing, say, silence, told, witty

• For those who don’t want Alexa listening in on your conversations, they’re making a male version that doesn’t listen to anything.

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  1 week ago

  Alexa, anything, conversation, conversations, humor, joke, listen, listening, making, male, male version, privacy, technology, version, want

• Everyone wants the bagel to be everything, but no one asks if the bagel needs anything.

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  1 week ago

  anything, bagel, everyone, everything, expectation, food, humor, metaphor, need, needs, wants

• People will love you. People will hate you. And none of it will have anything to do with you.

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  1 week ago

  anything, emotion, hate, love, none, people, perception, relationship, self

• I don’t do anything with my life except romanticize and decay with indecision.

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  1 week ago

  anything, decay, except, humor, i, indecision, laziness, life, procrastination, romanticize, self-deprecation

• If Keith Richards survived the ’70s, the ’80s, and 1.2 million Marlboros, I can probably survive anything.

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  1 week ago

  12, 1970s, 1980s, 80s, anything, humor, i, keith, Keith Richards, Marlboro, Marlboros, million, resilience, richards, smoking, survival, survive

• Kids don’t love anything as much as they love arguing with each other.

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  1 week ago

  anything, arguing, argument, family, humor, kid, kids, love, much, sibling

• I would do absolutely anything for my friends, except answer their text messages.

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  1 week ago

  absolutely, answer, anything, communication, except, friends, friendship, humor, i, interaction, loyalty, message, messages, procrastination, social, social interaction, text, text message

• Men be like “I would do anything for you,” and then do nothing.

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  1 week ago

  anything, disappointment, do nothing, humor, i, men, nothing, promises, relationships

• 80 years from now, this comment section will be full of dead people. Write anything you want.

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  1 week ago

  age, anything, comment, comment section, dark, dark humor, dead, death, full, future, humor, humor quote, internet, mortality, people, sarcasm, section, time, want

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