13 Funny keeps quotes

• “There’s a reason religion tells you your reward is after death; it keeps you quiet while you’re being exploited alive.”

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  5 days ago

  after, alive, being, belief, commentary, death, exploitation, humor, keeps, life, quiet, reason, religion, reward, silence, social, social commentary, while

• Ah, the magical land of Monday—the gift that keeps not giving!

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  6 days ago

  disappointment, gift, giving, humor, keeps, land, magic, magical, Monday, procrastination, sarcasm, workweek

• They say an apple a day keeps a doctor away. But what do I need to eat to keep everyone away?

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  7 days ago

  apple, avoidance, away, day, doctor, eat, eating, everyone, food, health, humor, i, interaction, joke, keep, keeps, need, say, social, social interaction

• Look, babe, I’m sorry. If your fake British accent keeps being this geographically inconsistent, I’m going to have to cancel the medieval roleplay sex.

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  1 week ago

  accent, apology, babe, being, British, British accent, cancel, dating, fake, geographic, geographic inconsistency, going, humor, inconsistency, keeps, medieval, relationship, roleplay, sarcasm, sex, sorry

• I hope this email keeps you awake at night.

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  1 week ago

  awake, email, hope, humor, i, keeps, message, night, sarcasm, sleep, wakefulness

• Is ChatGPT my father-in-law because it keeps making stuff up and passing it off as fact?

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  1 week ago

  ChatGPT, fact, family, father-in-law, humor, jokes, keeps, making, making stuff up, passing, stuff, technology

• It’s like winter is mad and keeps storming out, then coming back yelling ‘and another thing!’

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  1 week ago

  another, back, coming, frustration, humor, keeps, mad, return, storm, thing, weather, winter, yelling

• An apple a day may keep the doctor away, but some silly a day keeps the boredom at bay.

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  1 week ago

  apple, away, boredom, daily, daily routine, day, doctor, fun, humor, keep, keeps, routine, silly

• A garlic a day keeps people away.

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  1 week ago

  away, day, garlic, health, humor, keeps, people

• I think my boss is delusional; he keeps shaking his head and calls me Jesus Christ.

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  3 weeks ago

  boss, calls, christ, delusional, head, humor, i, Jesus, Jesus Christ, keeps, me, misunderstanding, nickname, shaking, shaking head, think, workplace

All funny keeps quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌