Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

68 Funny leave quotes

You should be allowed to leave work early if you are really in love.

3 months ago

Hosting Thanksgiving? Bring up politics so everyone will leave early.

3 months ago

Life is strange. We come into the world with nothing, then we struggle for everything, and finally, we leave with nothing.

3 months ago

Because of my looks, everyone only wants one thing from me, that I leave them alone.

3 months ago

The number one rule of Thanksgiving dinner is take your own vehicle so you can leave on your own terms.

3 months ago

If you tell me to make myself at home, I’m going to ask you to leave.

3 months ago

When Hulk wrecks shit he’s “incredible.” When I do it I’m “causing a scene” and “need to leave this place immediately.”

3 months ago

A service where you bring a working printer to my house, I print the one thing I need, and you leave again until next year.

3 months ago

I’m just falling in love with my problems now. Maybe they’ll leave me too.

3 months ago

Me at war: You guys mind if I leave a bit early today?

3 months ago

“Seize the day!” No thank you. I will leave the day alone and hope it extends me the same courtesy.

3 months ago

When the doorbell rings, I always go to the door with my jacket on. Depending on who it is, I either just want to leave or have just come home.

3 months ago

Here’s a fun activity you can do with your kids on rainy days when they have too much energy: Go shopping and leave them at home with their dad.

3 months ago

Aubrey Plaza is like an alien who went to earth to study us but accidentally got famous and can’t leave.

3 months ago

Adult friendships are difficult. The people I get on best with never want to leave the house either.

3 months ago

Please don’t leave me to my own devices. They’re all out of batteries.

3 months ago

Hello, my voicemail is currently unavailable. To leave a message please speak slowly and clearly into the nearest toaster.

3 months ago

Hi, where do you meet someone without dating apps and if you never leave your apartment? I need tips, please. Urgently!

3 months ago

Women are able to leave the country unexpectedly at any time with the contents of their handbag.

3 months ago

As everyone was arguing about politics, no one saw me leave with the cake.

3 months ago