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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

The Princess and the Pea, except it’s a rogue hair on the inside of my shirt driving me crazy all day.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

Real introverts are too introverted to tell people they’re introverts.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

Nobody is doing it like me because this is probably not the right way to do it.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

I think the key to happiness is having plenty of money and then telling all the poor people that money can’t buy happiness.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

Only time I believe a man is when he tells me that I’m pretty.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

ChatGPT’s primary use is to generate plausible excuses to leave dinner at the in-laws’.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

Had chicken and egg for dinner because I wanted to eat the whole family.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

I am the human version of tangled headphones.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Oh, you like NYC? Name every rat.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Gotta find someone you’re thermostatically compatible with. You can’t be a 74 dating a 62.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

615 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,208

Funny Quotes Topics

17,340

Funny Quotes Images

15,208

Dec 30, 2025

3,941

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Instagram:

My husband loves it when he orders fries, I say I don’t want any, and then I swoop in on his like a seagull at the beach.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Apple, who gives you permission to turn the brightness down again when I’ve just turned it up?

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Not opening up anymore, have fun trying to figure me out.

Going bananas on WeChat:

If i had $5 for every time I said up yours to someone, my butler would be saying it for me.

Going bananas on Telegram:

I got my patience from waiting half the day to download a song from Limewire.

Live now on WhatsApp:

I don’t drink blood to stay young. I do it mainly for the lifestyle.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Wouldn’t it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer and come out wrinkle free?

Freshly posted on Telegram:

If you accuse me of yelling, you will start to hear yelling so you can note the difference in the future.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Just caught a moth and sent it back outside. Feeling like Mr. Miyagi.

Spotted on Slack:

There are people that make their bed every morning and people who think it’s a waste of time, and then they marry each other.

235 Funny situation quotes

Funny situation quotes are all about those times when a simple moment turns into something hilariously unexpected! 😆💥 Whether it’s a weird encounter, a mix-up, or just the chaos of life, these quotes show that sometimes the funniest things happen when you least expect them. Life’s situations are always more fun with a good laugh! 😂🎭🎉

New funny situation quotes 👇

Took a break from social media because my cat was asleep on my phone.

0

2 weeks ago

asleep, break, cat, funny situation, media, phone, situation, sleep, social, social media
We’re in the middle of a snowstorm with no cake in the house. I never expected to perish like this.

0

3 weeks ago

cake, exaggeration, food, food shortage, house, humor, i, middle, never, perish, shortage, situation, snowstorm, survival, unexpected, unexpected situation, winter
Have you ever pretended not to look at the biscuits or sweets being handed around the room, and acted surprised when you got offered one?

0

3 weeks ago

around, being, biscuits, eating, ever, food, got, handed, humor, pretend, room, situation, snack, social, social situation, surprise, sweet, sweets, temptation
Behold the majestic elephant in its natural habitat, the room.

0

4 weeks ago

animal, awkward, awkward situation, elephant, funny observation, humor, joke, metaphor, natural, observation, room, situation
I’ve been asked to join a swingers club, but I’m a little nervous. What if I’m not good enough? I haven’t been on a swing since I was 9.

0

4 weeks ago

9, anxiety, asked, childhood, club, enough, good, humor, i, join, joke, little, nervous, situation, social, social situation, swing, swingers, swingers club
You looked so beautiful and combative as we were detained for questioning.

0

1 month ago

beautiful, beauty, combative, contrast, detained, humor, interaction, personality, personality contrast, questioning, sarcasm, situation, unexpected, unexpected situation
When someone sits in the empty seat beside you: flattered yet annoyed. When no one sits in the empty seat beside you: offended yet relieved.

0

1 month ago

annoyed, awkwardness, empty, empty seat, feelings, humor, irony, mixed, mixed feelings, offended, personal, personal space, reaction, seat, situation, social, social awkwardness, social situation, someone, space
Wife bought something on FB Marketplace, but she’s afraid she’ll get kidnapped, so she sends me to pick it up from a guy whose wife sent him because she’s afraid to get kidnapped.

0

1 month ago

afraid, Facebook, Facebook Marketplace, fear, funny situation, guy, husband, kidnap, kidnapped, marketplace, me, online, online purchase, pick, pickup, purchase, sent, shell, situation, something, wife, wife fear
I’m bad at being sad. Three minutes in, and I’m already making fun of my situation.

0

1 month ago

attitude, bad, being, coping, coping mechanism, emotions, fun, humor, making, mechanism, minutes, sad, sadness, self-deprecation, situation, three
Based on the amount of laundry I wash each week, I’m starting to think there are people who live here that I haven’t met yet.

0

2 months ago

amount, chore, funny observation, here, household, housemate, humor, i, laundry, live, living, living situation, met, mystery, observation, people, situation, starting, think, wash, washing, week

For even more funny situation quotes, hit next 👇

All funny situation quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

10 shares on YouTube this month:

Stealing hoodies is for amateurs. Steal his car like a real woman.

58 shares on Facebook this month:

Mail is crazy because it’s like 99 pieces of straight up garbage and 1 that if you don’t reply to you’re going to jail.

41 shares on Discord this month:

Calling someone a “tough cookie” isn’t a compliment, tough cookies are literally the worst cookies.

49 shares on Facebook this month:

There’s a cougar warning in my neighborhood, but apparently it’s just a big cat. I bought a case of wine coolers for nothing.

84 shares on Pinterest this month:

My optimism doesn’t come out of thin air. A flask is involved.

80 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I have a date and nothing to wear. Or as Nietzsche said: If you stare into a closet long enough, the closet stares back at you.

75 shares on Slack this month:

Behind every robot that turns evil is an engineer who specifically installed red LEDs into the eyes just for this scenario.

20 shares on Snapchat this month:

I call my smoke detector Gordon Ramsay, because every time I cook it screams at me.

28 shares on Instagram this month:

Humans can accomplish so much, unless it’s parking at a shopping center during the holidays.

62 shares on WeChat this month:

Why waste words or gestures when a raised eyebrow is enough to make a statement?

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

If you think about it, Santa really has the best job, he works one day a year and spends the rest of his time judging people.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Blocking me is like blocking the sun, the moon and the stars.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m at the age where any time my mom asks if I remember so-and-so from high school, the news is never good.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

If it doesn’t get a like in the first two years, I delete it.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Told someone I’m as “single as a pringle and as neato as a dorito” and they blocked me immediately.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

My ex was like “I know a spot,” then took me to the lowest point in my life.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not worried about shattering the illusion, I want to smash it to pieces.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I just came across my wife’s Tinder profile and I’m so angry about her lies. She is not “fun to be around”.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

We could have high-speed rail that connects the entire country, but instead we get AI porn bots that steal all of our drinking water to entertain the dumbest people alive.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

They should invent someone who holds me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

615 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,208

Funny Quotes Topics

17,340

Funny Quotes Images

15,208

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,837

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

My mother always told me, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, say nothing at all.” Needless to say, I’m not much of a conversationalist.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

Grown men carpooling to the strip club so they can get boners and drive home together.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

You can chill with someone a whole day at the university, and never see them again in your life, lol.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Doctor: Your body has run out of magnesium. Me: OMg.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

“23 and Me” is how Leonardo DiCaprio RSVPs for events.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Having a daughter is like having a little broke best friend who thinks you’re rich.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Your honor, if it pleases the court, here’s Wonderwall.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

Life hack: You can’t be sad if you are asleep.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

Dress for the demons you want, not the demons you have.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

Love it when you say or do some common sense thing and the other person has “file not found” written all over their face.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Everything I like is either expensive, illegal, or wont text me back.

Seen just now on Telegram:

People who scream sneeze need their own island.

Shared recently on Facebook:

If you love me, please don’t ask me to go camping with you.

Spotted on Telegram:

Flossed the day before a dentist appointment like I was cramming for a history test.

Breaking via TikTok:

The only exercise I’ve done this month is running… out of money!

Going viral on Facebook:

I woke up again, it’s pathetic how much death fears me.

Just shared via Instagram:

You want me to pay attention to the details? The thing the devil is in?

Trending via Snapchat:

I don’t approve of political jokes. I’ve seen what happens when they get elected.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

They should make a biopic of just some random guy.

Making waves on Slack:

It’s been so long since I had sex last, went jogging in flip flops just to remember the sound.

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