Funny quotes situation

142 Funny situation quotes

Just rolled over for a cuddle.. forgot I’m single… fell off the bed.

4 days ago

There’s a disgusting pervert at the bar watching pornography over my shoulder.

2 weeks ago

Absolutely no reason for a single guy to be in a sunflower field. Get out of there, pervert!

2 weeks ago

When your parents are on a call and they ask for a pen, man, that pressure is real.

3 weeks ago

You can mess up big time letting someone know you have a printer.

1 month ago

Deodorant? No, I never need to buy any. People just give it to me. Complete strangers sometimes.

1 month ago

I don’t wanna meet your family, bring my plate to the car.

1 month ago

That’s me in the corner, that’s me in the spotlight, spreading goat cheese on a bagel.

1 month ago

The awkward moment when someone’s zipper is down and you don’t know whether to tell them or not.

1 month ago

I hate when I offer someone food and they accept it.

1 month ago

The first person to throw out bath water: Uh oh.

1 month ago

Thanksgiving ain’t been the same ever since my uncle pulled that gun out on everybody.

1 month ago

That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you’re shopping for something else because they just won’t budge.

1 month ago

If you pass out in front of your kids they will either try to call an ambulance or use you as a trampoline. You just don’t know.

1 month ago

The best thing about living with my parents is being woken up four minutes before my alarm to be told my alarm is about to go off.

1 month ago

You’re in his DMs, I’m outside his window with a JBL speaker streaming Taylor Swift.

1 month ago

That awkward moment when someone gets angry at you for clicking a pen, but you have to click it one more time to use it.

1 month ago

If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money, I’d just laugh and search with them.

1 month ago

Hobbies include fake smiling while waiting for people to stop talking.

2 months ago

Currently helping my husband look for his $20 I spent yesterday.

2 months ago

Everyone becomes a robo-dancer when the motion sensor faucet isn’t working.

2 months ago

My secret talent is turning any situation into a considerably more awkward one.

2 months ago

It’s been so long since I had sex last, went jogging in flip flops just to remember the sound.

2 months ago

It doesn’t matter how bizarre your situation is. Somebody on Reddit already been there, done that.

2 months ago

Everyone’s gangster until they need to pee.

2 months ago

Accidentally wore a blue shirt to Walmart and now I’m in the stockroom showing Sue how to use the forklift.

3 months ago

It’s amazing how music can transport you to another place. For example, this coffee shop is playing Justin Bieber, so I’m going to another restaurant.

3 months ago

Messed up and threw a surprise party for my minimalist friend. Now 25 of us are hiding behind the granite orb.

3 months ago

Is the elephant in the room with us right now?

3 months ago

I’m going spiraling, do you need anything?

3 months ago