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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

Y’all can keep the nonchalant ones — I want mine weak in the knees about me.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

I finally figured out my lifelong dream of becoming a human blanket, but my friends still call it napping on their couch.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

You wish you had this many chins.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

Every year I realize how dumb I was a year ago.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

If I was God, I would’ve equipped women with venom glands.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

Moose would have been a better name for a cow.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

My ex texted me saying, “Hey, I miss you,” so I replied, “Sorry, I have zero bars — the past doesn’t have good reception.”

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Adulthood these days is just bills and running out of memory on devices.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

If you can’t look back at your younger self and realize that you were an idiot, you are probably still an idiot.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

Just paid my bills, so don’t ask me to come out. I’m at home getting my money’s worth.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2450 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,612

Funny Quotes Topics

15,284

Funny Quotes Images

12,612

Updated

51 minutes ago

Users Online

3,454

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on TikTok:

“At your big age” is one of my favorite insults.

Trending via Telegram:

I’m at a place in my life when errands are starting to count as going out.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

My bank assures me my money is safe with them, yet they keep their pens chained to desks and most of them are missing.

Just landed via Telegram:

I hope all of you get laid and not laid off this year. Amen.

Going viral on Reddit:

Don’t think my brain is braining properly today.

Just shared via WeChat:

New email opener just dropped: “I am interested in bothering you!”

Making waves on Discord:

Do you think they’re called cough drops because when you cough really hard they drop out of your mouth onto the floor?

Spotted on Twitch:

Don’t forget to look directly into the sun for at least 10 minutes per day because that’s where all the vitamins are.

Going viral on Telegram:

I’ll let you guys know if the psych ward has wifi.

Going viral on Slack:

Seeing a BBL in real life is a reality-altering experience.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2450 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,612

Funny Quotes Topics

15,284

Funny Quotes Images

12,612

Updated

51 minutes ago

Users Online

3,452

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

I’m sorry, but I already have an A.I. boyfriend.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

Don’t forget to whine and complain about Monday today.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

Roadtripping with my family has taught me that my marriage can withstand anything except roadtripping with my family.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

Cracking the ice cubes out probably feels so good for the ice tray.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

If you have a Roomba, but don’t dress it up in little outfits, then what are you even doing?

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

Accidentally wore a blue shirt to Walmart and now I’m in the stockroom showing Sue how to use the forklift.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

The void screams into me.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

The days will soon be shorter again. Then it won’t rain for so long.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

Who called it a Cybertruck and not a Deplorean?

Someone from 🇩🇴 has copied:

When they know you know they did you dirty, they stay gone. And that’s the best thing.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Discord:

Getting older is realizing how great doing nothing is.

Trending via Pinterest:

If your kids aren’t drinking enough water, tell them it’s bedtime.

Just landed via YouTube:

Killing with kindness is a murder by compliments.

Reported on Facebook:

More dangerous than a lion that roars is a woman gone silent.

Spotted on WeChat:

The only traditional costume people around me wear is sweatpants.

Trending via Slack:

At no single point in the Bible does it tell you not to sell drugs.

Just shared via Messenger:

Have y’all tried calories? They’re so good.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.

Just landed via Telegram:

My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do.

Going viral on Reddit:

I’m always happy when I come home from shopping and the note on the table reminds me of what I wanted to buy.

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