Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times, I’m never sending you nudes again. Posted on12 hours ago
I prefer the Easter Bunny, for starters, he’s not making a list and checking it twice, and more importantly, he’s not watching me when I’m sleeping. Posted on14 hours ago
Totally unrealistic movie title: “The Postman Always Rings Twice”. We all know that these guys only ring once and then leave. Posted on2 days ago
Middle-aged math is going out drinking and feeling half your age then waking up the next morning feeling twice your age. Posted on2 days ago