Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: Self-checkout is amazing for introverts until the machine breaks and two employees have to come fix it while you wait.

Commentary:
Ah, the sweet promise of self-checkout: a chance for introverts to avoid small talk with cashiers… until the machine decides to rebel against its creators and bring attention to your existence 🤖🛠️ Cue the hilarious awkwardness and quietly panicked internal monologues! 😅 #IntrovertProblems
6 months ago
Share →: A.I. should be forced to wait tables before it’s allowed to make art.

Commentary:
"Perhaps if A.I. mastered waiting tables, their art might come with a side of fries 🤖🍟 Who knew serving up dishes could be the secret ingredient to creating masterpieces? Bon appétit, robots!"
6 months ago
Share →: Most people don’t listen at all, they just wait until they can continue talking.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic case of selective hearing – more like selective talking! 🙉💬 Just remember, conversations are a two-way street, not a monologue marathon! 😄🚦"
6 months ago
Share →: Can’t wait to put up holiday lights so life can be equally crappy but festively so.

Commentary:
"Ah, 'tis the season for embracing the crap with a side of sparkle! ✨ Who knew that holiday lights could add a touch of festivity to life's chaos? 🎄 Here's to turning our 'crappy' moments into twinkling triumphs! 💫"
6 months ago
Share →: Have you ever met someone and thought that you couldn’t wait to spend the rest of your life without them?

Commentary:
"Well, that's one way to fast-track a relationship to 'exit' mode! 🏃‍♂️💨 Who needs a crystal ball when you've already got a clear vision of your future without them? 😂 Better luck next time in the roommate lottery! 🤷‍♀️🔮"
6 months ago
Share →: Telling my boss I wasn’t drunk really backfired. I probably should have waited until he asked.

Commentary:
Oh, poor planning there! 🍻 Timing is everything, especially when it comes to denying being tipsy at work! ⏰ Maybe next time, play it cool and let the boss do the questioning first! 😅 #OfficeBlunders
6 months ago
Share →: Do y’all watch the results come or do you go to bed and wait to see what Democracy Claus left you in the morning?

Commentary:
"Ah, the eternal dilemma of election night – stay up late for the political thriller or hit the hay and let Democracy Claus surprise you in the morning! 🎅🗳️✨ Who needs a bedtime story when you have the suspense of democracy at work? Sleep tight, dream of ballots, and wake up to unwrap your civic gifts!"
6 months ago
Share →: Wait. We’re now turning plants into burgers? Haven’t cows been doing that like, forever.

Commentary:
Oh, the audacity of technology trying to outdo Mother Nature! 🌱🍔🐮 Looks like cows might soon be filing a complaint for copyright infringement! 🤣 #PlantPower #BurgerRevolution
6 months ago
Share →: “Your account balance is low!” Brother, wait until you see my will to live.

Commentary:
😂💸 "If my will to live had a bank account, it'd also be overdrafted! #BrokeInSpirit" 💀💳
6 months ago
Share →: I can’t wait to see my older sister so she can point out I have more gray hair than she does.

Commentary:
"Meeting your older sister is like walking into a live-action reality show called 'Gray Hair Chronicles'! 🤣👵 Can't wait for the inevitable 'silver lining' jokes she's got up her sleeve! 💁‍♀️✨"