29 Funny act quotes

• 

  4 days ago

  Share →: I’ve mastered farting, and it be loud and quick, but the key is don’t make a face or look around, so people can’t pinpoint it to you. Just act natural.

  Commentary:
  Silent but not-so-deadly detective work in progress! 😆🕵️‍♂️💨

• 

  4 days ago

  Share →: To quote Hamlet Act III, Scene III, Line 92 “No.”

  Commentary:
  When Shakespeare predicted every multiple-choice test ever given, he was onto something 🎭😂✏️

• 

  1 week ago

  Share →: I will not accept a hint. I will act dumb until you say it clearly to me.

  Commentary:
  When it comes to hints, I'm on a strict see-no-clue diet. 🙈🤷‍♂️🔍

• 

  4 weeks ago

  Share →: I hate starting new relationships. I gotta act like I ain’t crazy for two months.

  Commentary:
  "When you gotta pretend you're a 'normal' human for 60 days… 🤪🚀 #OscarWorthyPerformance"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Hey, sorry I acted weird the other day. I was trying so hard to act normal that it backfired.

  …

  Commentary:
  "Trying to be normal is my superpower, but I must have left my cape at home! 🦸‍♂️😜😂"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything, and all you can think is: “Act normal, you are innocent.”

  Commentary:
  🛒😅 Ah, the classic "walk of shame" out of a store empty-handed! That awkward moment when you turn into a secret agent, trying to convince everyone that you're just a harmless window shopper. 🕵️‍♂️ "Act normal, blend in with the non-shoppers," you whisper to yourself, as if you're the star of a spy movie set in a shopping mall! Just keep calm and carry on…without the shopping bags. 😉

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: You gotta act cool, calm, and collected around liquid eyeliner because it can sense your fear.

  Commentary:
  “Beware the liquid eyeliner—it’s like an emotional ninja stealthily waiting for your moment of weakness. Stay calm, stay steady, or you’ll end up with a spider’s web on your eyelids! 😱👁️💧🤣”

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: The highest act of rebellion is to relax unconditionally.

  Commentary:
  Ah, yes, the audacity of embracing calm in a chaotic world – the ultimate act of defiance! 🌟✨ Who knew that lounging on the couch could be such a radical statement? 😄💆‍♂️ Just imagine the sheer disruption caused by someone peacefully sipping their tea without a care in the world! 🍵🌎💥 So go ahead, rebel against the hustle and bustle by chilling out with gusto! 🕶️

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: When you’re late for work, you gotta walk in fast and act like you’re mad.

  Commentary:
  🚶‍♂️💨 "When you're late for work, just remember: walk in like you own the place and blame it on traffic with a poker face. Bonus points if you throw in some dramatic sighs and eye rolls for added effect! Who said being fashionably late couldn't be a comedy show in itself? 😂 #LateButFabulous"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: One thing about me is I don’t even need to get drunk to act a fool.

  Commentary:
  "When you're naturally a walking comedy show 🤪🍹 Why wait for happy hour when you're a full-time entertainer, right?! 😆 #LivingMyBestLife"

For even more funny act quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny act quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌