Funny anytime quotes

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  2 months ago

  Share →: When I say “the other day”, it can be anytime between yesterday and my birth.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the infamous "other day" — basically the RSVP of time references! 🎉🗓️ It's like saying "soon" or "let’s do it sometime," which really means "whenever I remember or feel like it." 😂 So next time someone drops the "other day" bomb, just prepare for a timeline that stretches from yesterday to the dawn of humanity! 🕰️⏳ Talk about a flexible schedule!

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  4 months ago

  Share →: You gotta be careful: don’t say a word to nobody about nothing anytime ever.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the universal code of secrecy: speaketh not, whispereth never, revealith nothing! It's like trying to keep a secret in a house full of gossipy ghosts – good luck with that!"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Anytime I switch deodorants, it’s like a sexy stranger is following me around all day.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the magical allure of a new deodorant scent! 💫✨ Just think of it as a mysterious, seductive companion accompanying you on your daily adventures. 😏 Who says romance is dead when you've got a sexy stranger lurking in your armpits! 🕵️‍♂️💃"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Anytime someone throws a Great Gatsby themed party, I have to assume they never finished the book.

  Commentary:
  "Throwing a Great Gatsby themed party without finishing the book is like hosting a Harry Potter night without knowing who Voldemort is 😆📚 It's all glitz and glam until someone realizes they missed the memo on Gatsby's tragic demise! 🎉 #PartyFail"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Any cults got something wild planned anytime soon? I’m trying to find the good estate sales.

  Commentary:
  "Looking for some killer deals, huh? Better watch out for those cults, they might have some 'killer' estate sales planned! 👀💰 Just make sure you don't accidentally sign up for their next pyramid scheme… or pyramid tomb? 🏛️😂 #EstateSaleGoals"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Anytime a guy says “that’s what she said” always reply with “yeah, but not to you”.

  Commentary:
  Oh, perfect comeback strategy! Turn the tables and leave them speechless! 🤭👀 Just imagine their faces when you hit back with that line – priceless! 😂💥 Keep 'em on their toes with some sassy sass! 😏👏 #SassyAndClassy

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Honestly, shopping beats therapy, anytime. It costs the same and you get a dress out of it.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs therapy when you can have a fabulous dress? 💁‍♀️🛍️ Retail therapy is the best kind of self-care – with a side of fashion! 💃💳 #ShoppingHeals"

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