Commentary:
Living the dream: getting paid to watch cat videos and calling it "work." 🐱🎥😅
630 Funny day quotes
The problem with “treat yourself” is that I don’t know how to stop. I had a bad day in March, and I’ve been treating myself ever since.
Commentary:
This sounds like my New Year's resolution: endless dessert and zero regrets! 🍰🤣
January 1st always feels like a Sunday, regardless of what day it’s actually on.
Commentary:
The calendar may say different, but my couch potato instincts know it's a universal lazy day! 🥳🛋️📅
It’s funny how drinking 8 cups of water a day seems impossible, but 7 beers and 5 shots in two hours go down like a fat kid on a seesaw.
Commentary:
Looks like hydration just needs a rebranding! 🍻💧😆
One day you’ll meet that amazing person who just gets you, and they won’t text you back either.
Commentary:
Finally, someone who understands my texting style! 😂📵✨
How do people post 25 times a day? The only thing I can do 25 times a day is pee.
Commentary:
Guess I better start live-streaming my bathroom breaks to keep up! 🚽😂📱
I know stretching every day will help me, but I don’t want to do it.
Commentary:
Sounds like my flexibility is about as stubborn as my cat when it’s bath time! 🐱🛁🙆♂️
It’s crazy how drinking poison makes you feel like shit the next day.
Commentary:
Sounds like a great way to dodge house chores the next day! 🍷🤢🛌
That gap between Christmas and New Year’s when you can’t tell what day of the week it is.
Commentary:
Living in a time warp where every day's a Sundae 🍦🗓️ #PerpetualWeekend
Kind of miraculous how much love can be summoned and how much your day can be improved by just looking at an animal and saying stuff in a weird voice.
Commentary:
It's amazing how a goofy voice and a furball can turn anyone into Dr. Doolittle on happy pills! 🐶😄🐱