13 Funny dollars quotes

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  3 months ago

  Share →: I think something’s missing in my life… Like… 2-3 million dollars.

  Commentary:
  "Well, if 2-3 million dollars is what's missing in your life, I'd say you're just a few zeros away from being truly fulfilled. Who needs inner peace and self-discovery when you can have a yacht and endless shopping sprees, right?"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: Sometimes I just want someone to hug me and say “I know it’s hard, but you’ll be okay. Here’s a coffee and a million dollars.”

  Commentary:
  "If only all problems could be solved with a hug, coffee, and a million dollars! Who needs therapy when you've got caffeine and cash, right? Just imagine the line at the hug and coffee shop if this were a reality – we'd all be lining up for our daily dose of comfort and caffeine!"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: My biggest sexual fantasy is someone throwing a million dollars on my naked body and then leaving me alone.

  Commentary:
  "If only our wishes had monetary value! 😂 Imagine the joy of being rich and literally **showered** in cash, but hey, maybe being left alone afterward is the real treasure 🤑💸 #FantasyGoals"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: No crypto for me, thanks, at least not until I figure out how dollars work.

  Commentary:
  "Skipping the crypto train for now 🚂💰 because let's face it, mastering the art of handling dollars is challenging enough as it is! 💸😅 #Priorities"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Jury duty is a wild concept. Whenever the government wants, they can just be like “Call off work, bestie, we need you to solve a murder. Here’s fifteen dollars.”

  Commentary:
  "Jury duty: the ultimate surprise office party where you get to play detective without the cool spy gadgets. 🔍💼 And the pay? A whopping $15 to solve real-life mysteries. Sign me up for that adventure! 🕵️‍♂️💸"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I’m currently on a really effective diet called “I only have twenty dollars until payday”.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs fancy diet plans when you've got the 'broke until payday' regime! 🤑🥗 It's the ultimate test of willpower and budgeting skills. Just remember, you're not hungry, you're just financially disciplined! 😂💸 #DietGoals"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I don’t know if I’m pregnant or what, but I’ve been craving 3 million dollars so bad.

  Commentary:
  "Either that's a very extravagant pregnancy craving or someone needs to check if there's a money tree growing somewhere nearby! 💰🌳 Maybe it's just the financial fertility kicking in! 🤰😂"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Having little kids is great because I love spending hundreds of dollars each week to feed my floor and my trash can.

  Commentary:
  "Parenting tip: Want to lose weight? Just have kids. You'll skip the gym and burn calories chasing after food scraps and discarded snacks all day! 🏃‍♂️💸🗑️ #ParentingStruggles #FloorFoodies"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: “Girls just want to have fun!” No, I want one million dollars cash.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs fun when you can have a million dollars in cold, hard cash 💸💰 Girls will be girls…with expensive tastes! 😄💁‍♀️ #CashOverFun"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I don’t need to touch grass, I need to touch one million dollars cash.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs grass when you can roll in a bed of crisp Benjamins? 💵💰 Talk about living the high life! Just remember, money can't photosynthesize like grass does… but hey, it does pay for a fancy lawn service! 😉 #CashOverGrass"

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