Wordgag ツ

3 months ago
Share →: Feeling guilty for taking up the entire therapy session talking about myself.

Commentary:
"Therapist: 'How do you feel about monopolizing the session?' Me: 'Guilty, but also oddly accomplished. 🤷‍♂️💁‍♀️' Remember, it's called 'therapy,' not 'them-apy' for a reason! 😆 #SelfCenteredAndProud"
4 months ago
Share →: I was feeling kinda lonely this morning so I glued a coffee cup to the top of my car so people would wave at me.

Commentary:
"Who needs a pet when you can have a coffee cup companion on your morning commute? ☕🚗 Give it a try and watch the waves come pouring in! Just remember to drive safely and avoid any suspicious looks from passing drivers. 😄"
4 months ago
Share →: In the 80s, if you woke up feeling thirsty, you could drink some of your waterbed.

Commentary:
"Ah, the 80s, where even your bed could quench your thirst! 🛏️💦 Who needs to walk to the kitchen when you can just sip from your waterbed? Talk about convenience – and potential for a soggy morning! 😂 #ThrowbackThirsty"
4 months ago
Share →: My bed wasn’t feeling well this morning, so I had to stay home to take care of it.

Commentary:
Looks like the bed had a case of Monday blues! 😂🛏️ It's important to give it some TLC too! Hope it feels better soon! 🤞☕ #BedRestIsRequired
4 months ago
Share →: I think I’m emotionally constipated because I haven’t given a shit in months.

Commentary:
"Looks like someone's emotional plumbing needs a good flush! 💩 Maybe it's time for some emotional fiber to get things moving again! 😂"
4 months ago
Share →: I need money, not feelings.

Commentary:
"Who needs to be showered with affection when you can be showered with dollar bills? Money talks, feelings whisper… quietly in the corner."
4 months ago
Share →: I can’t sleep good when I know the food is feeling cold in the fridge.

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old dilemma of balancing your own sleep with the well-being of your leftovers. It's like a moral dilemma straight out of a Shakespearean tragedy. To eat, or not to eat… that is the question! Whether 'tis nobler to grant yourself sweet dreams, or to suffer the pangs of a rumbling stomach past midnight. Alas, poor pizza slice, I knew him well!"
4 months ago
Share →: I’m not feeling very worky today.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic case of a severe lack of workiness! It's a condition many of us suffer from on Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays… well, you get the idea. Stay strong, my friend, and remember, you're not alone in your struggle against the evil forces of productivity!"
4 months ago
Share →: Relationship so bad you start relating to Taylor Swift songs.

Commentary:
"When your relationship reaches Taylor Swift level drama, it's like you're living in your very own country music ballad. Just remember, there's no shame in belting out those lyrics and pretending you're in your own music video – complete with the dramatic breakup scene and inevitable revenge plot twist!"
4 months ago
Share →: Boys are disgusting. Can’t believe I like these things.

Commentary:
"Boys may be like a box of chocolates – sometimes sweet, sometimes nutty, but always a little messy! Just remember, it's all part of the charm… or so they say!"