46 Funny high quotes

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  21 hours ago

  View →: The number of times I stand in a room, staring because I forgot why I walked in there, is embarrassingly high.
• 

  2 days ago

  View →: ALF is what happens when you are high on drugs in the 80s.
• 

  3 weeks ago

  View →: Some people’s high horses are actually donkeys.
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  4 weeks ago

  View →: I have friends in high places (birds).
• 

  1 month ago

  View →: I cannot imagine being in high school right now. Imagine the world is eating itself alive and you’re in school.
• 

  2 months ago

  View →: The cost of living has gotten so high, I’m thinking about having a nap for dinner.
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  2 months ago

  View →: Why would I take the high road when I could take the psychopath?
• 

  2 months ago

  View →: Cloud 9 is a very high place to fall from.
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  3 months ago

  View →: Imagine hating me, and I’m over here with one hand in my pocket, and the other one giving a high five.
• 

  3 months ago

  View →: I’m so high at Home Depot right now, and I have to ask where the hose at. And I know I’mma laugh when I do.
• 

  3 months ago

  View →: In my experience, bowling and pancakes have the same energy. High hopes at the beginning, lowered self-esteem at the end.
• 

  3 months ago

  View →: I would just once like to feel as powerful as a toddler throwing their sippy cup whilst sitting atop their high chair.
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  3 months ago

  View →: Not trying to brag but I just beat the high score on this blood pressure machine.
• 

  3 months ago

  View →: I can’t believe I used to think I was stressed in high school.
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  3 months ago

  View →: Harry Potter is sort of crazy. I would have never fought a war for my high school.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: Way too many low IQ conspiracy theories floating around. Give me high IQ conspiracy theories.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: I’ve reached the conclusion that all men love thigh high stockings.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: In high school I was voted “most likely to hold a grudge” and I’m still mad about it.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: Just rolled a joint. Not to get high or anything. It was just my ankle.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: I have no desire to work now. I had five days off in a row where I dined at a feast and was entertained at a cinema. I have flown too high to return to a laptop.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: It’s really hard to come back after a poorly executed high five.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I like to scan my backyard every hour with a high power flashlight to let my neighbors know I won’t tolerate any weirdness around here.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Why would I go to my high school reunion? I didn’t want to be there the first time.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: Facebook is like a never-ending high school reunion.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: An escape room, but it’s just your high school reunion.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: If you see me out in public but we haven’t talked since high school, let’s keep it that way.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: I’m at the age where any time my mom asks if I remember so-and-so from high school, the news is never good.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: I feel sorry for Netflix era kids. They will never know the high stakes adrenaline of running away in an ad break, with the beckoning call of a sibling screaming “It’s ON!” to send you hurdling over furniture to get back in time.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: “You’re so funny!” Thanks, I didn’t get laid in high school.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: Acceptance truly begins when you ask Alexa to play classic rock and she plays a song that came out when you were in high school.

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