Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡­πŸ‡³ has copied:

Cats spend two-thirds of their lives sleeping, and the other third making viral videos.

Someone from πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡¦ has shared:

Those astronauts that just landed? They should be greeted by chimpanzees on horses.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡± has downloaded:

Women’s skincare is so confusing. Am I supposed to look shiny and sweaty, or matte like cement?

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡ͺ has downloaded:

Sorry I was late, I was disassociating in the shower.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ί has downloaded:

Not to brag but I can chop an onion without crying. And I can cry without chopping an onion.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡ͺ has viewed:

A dating app for people who self sabotage called Hinder.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡³ has shared:

Went on a date with a guy who didn’t ask me any questions about myself, so it’s on him when he finds out about my husband.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡¨ has viewed:

Starting your day with an early morning run is a great way to make sure your day can’t get any worse than it started.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡· has bookmarked:

Never signed up for a 401k cause there’s no way in hell I can run that far.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡¦ has viewed:

You can tell me what you want, but alcohol and eye contact are a dangerous combination.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

831 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,993

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,993

Updated

2 hours ago

Users Online

3,427

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Shared recently on X:

The sweet potato is the kindest vegetable.

Going viral on Threads:

If I had The Force, I’d just use it to open pistachios.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

When society eventually breaks down and we are left to rebuild civilization, I hope there are people who still know how to make cheese.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Behind every robot that turns evil is an engineer who specifically installed red LEDs into the eyes just for this scenario.

Going viral on Instagram:

Yes, hello, I’d like to exchange my generational trauma for generational wealth, please.

Spotted on Telegram:

Your opinions are not my business.

Making waves on Discord:

Some things are better left unsaid, but people get drunk and say them anyway.

Spotted on YouTube:

As a pigeon mother, I would never let my pigeon daughter hang around the station. That’s really no place for a young pigeon lady.

Just shared via WeChat:

If I block you and you email me, you’re getting another chance.

Trending via YouTube:

Sorry, I can’t today, I have to rot in bed and squander my potential.

Home Β» Funny Start Quotes

132 Funny start quotes

Funny start quotes capture those awkward, hilarious moments when we begin something new! πŸ˜…πŸš€ Whether it’s starting a project and instantly regretting it, or the classic struggle of getting off the couch to start your workout (only to be distracted by snacks), these quotes remind us that every new beginning comes with a dose of comedy. Here’s to those not-so-glamorous β€œstarts”! πŸ˜‚πŸ“…πŸŽ‰

New funny start quotes πŸ‘‡

For even more funny start quotes, check out the next page, if available πŸ‘‡

All funny start quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes πŸ‘Œ

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! πŸ˜‰βœŒοΈ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. πŸ˜‚πŸ’₯

Trending Funny Quotes πŸ“ˆ

Hot Funny Quotes πŸ”₯

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

831 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,993

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,993

Updated

2 hours ago

Users Online

3,440

Funny Quotes of the Month πŸš€

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡¬ has shared:

Everybody say a little prayer for my husband, he just told me to calm down.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡° has copied:

Driving to work, and I just reached down to touch my leg to make sure I have pants on.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ή has shared:

Hot singles over 40 in your area are curious what you use for joint pain and inflammation.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Ή has downloaded:

Self-checkout is amazing for introverts until the machine breaks and two employees have to come fix it while you wait.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡² has bookmarked:

How is it still this week?

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡© has copied:

Grandparents are there to help the kids get into trouble and teach them stupid things they wouldn’t think of on their own.

Someone from πŸ‡­πŸ‡Ή has downloaded:

I love traveling because I love to check if I have my passport every 3-4 minutes.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡Ό has viewed:

There’s a reason we say cheese and not salad when we have to smile for a photo.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡§ has downloaded:

It’d be nice if my bank account filled up as quickly as my laundry basket.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡Έ has shared:

I taped a picture of my paycheck on my front door to keep all the solicitors away.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Just shared via Threads:

I’ve walked the walk, but nowadays I just sit the sit.

Trending via Discord:

I don’t need a midlife crisis. My whole life is a crisis.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

My dream car is a taco truck.

Going viral on YouTube:

I’m not saying I’ve aged like fine wine, but I am currently being stored in a dark place and avoiding sunlight at all costs.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I love being wrong, it’s just like being right except easier and I get to be stupid, which is my favorite thing.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Any jar is a swear jar when the lid won’t open.

Seen just now on Instagram:

See you when you get home from school, I whisper to my kid’s apple.

Making waves on Twitch:

I can’t take people who pronounce “gnocchi” correctly seriously.

Shared recently on Threads:

Stop blaming others for your mistakes. Study Feng Shui and blame the furniture.

Reported on Messenger:

If Dracula had a cat, she’d be the one sleeping in the coffin.

Share Wordgag πŸ™

Β© 2025. All fights retarded. πŸ€ͺ

Made with ❀️ in Sydney β˜€οΈπŸŒ΄