23 Funny wants quotes

• 

  4 days ago

  Share →: Every guy wants to be called Daddy till that test comes back positive.

  Commentary:
  "When 'Who's your daddy?' takes a plot twist! 😅🍼 #UnexpectedPositivity"

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: The heart wants what it wants, but it’s not the only organ that has a vote.

  Commentary:
  "When your heart and stomach are in a heated debate over that last slice of pizza. 🍕❤️🤔"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: Everyone wants a drunk text until I’m doing it at noon.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew 'brunch' was short for 'beware of surprise texts'? 🥂📱🤣"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: They should invent a job that actually wants to hire you after you apply.

  Commentary:
  "Is there an app for instant approvals yet? Asking for a friend… and their resume. 🤔🧑‍💻📄"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: A narcissist wants the authority of a king while having the accountability of a toddler.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the classic royal tantrum with a crown and zero chores! 👑🍼 A narcissist craving kingly power but dodging responsibility like a kid hiding from vegetables. Guess they want the throne without the throne-room cleanup! 😂⚖️

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: “Listen to your body!” Okay, well, my body wants to lay down and eat snacks all day.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the human struggle: trying to find a balance between listening to your body and not letting it run the show. 🤷‍♂️ Maybe if we all had snackceptional self-control, we'd be napping less and snacking more. 🛌🍪 #SnacksOnTheBrain"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: “You’re such a stalker!” God forbid a woman wants to know more about her future husband.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the fine line between love and stalking – it's all about perspective, really! 🕵️‍♀️🤷‍♂️ Who knew gathering intel on your future spouse could be frowned upon? 😂#RelationshipGoals #StalkerInLove"

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: Husband said he only wants to allow our kids to watch Looney Tunes and nothing else because of the “moral lessons”.

  Commentary:
  Oh, sure, because we all know the most profound life lessons are learned from an anvil falling on someone's head and a bird outsmarting a coyote! 🐦🎩 Looks like this dad is really onto something, teaching his kids the important values of high-speed chases and explosive pranks! 😂 #ParentingGoals

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: She doesn’t want flowers, she wants to invoke an ancient curse.

  Commentary:
  Well, we all have our unique gift preferences, right? 💐🔮 Who needs roses when you can summon ancient spirits instead? 🌚 Next time you're shopping for a gift, remember: it's all fun and games until the mummy wakes up! 😂🌹 #AncientCurseGoals

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Spiraling out of control if anyone wants anything.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the classic case of spiral-manity! 🌀🤷‍♂️ When chaos reigns and requests fly left, right, and center, it's every man for himself! Just hold on tight, folks, and hope for the best amidst this whirlwind of demands! 🤯🎢 #LifeInASpiral

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