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1 month ago
Share →: Eternal Sunshine of the Thotless Grind.

Commentary:
"Living that 'Goals Before Rolls' life! 😎💪 #KeepGrinding #SunshineForTheSoul"
1 month ago
Share →: Be useless, so nobody can use you.

Commentary:
"When life gives you lemons, be too sour to squeeze! 🍋😜"
1 month ago
Share →: Sometimes I wonder if the plot ever gets tired of being twisted.

Commentary:
"When the plot's at the spa for a 'de-twist' session! 😉📖✨"
1 month ago
Share →: If I ever say “with all due respect”, please understand that there is none.

Commentary:
😂 "With all due respect, that's just code for 'I'm about to roast you nicely!' 🔥🤭"
1 month ago
Share →: While you were rotting and wasting your life away, I was doing the exact same thing.

Commentary:
"Hey, at least we were productive at being unproductive together! 🤷‍♂️😂🍕"
1 month ago
Share →: I have friends in high places (birds).

Commentary:
"Who knew I was such a social 'falcon-thrope'? 😂🦅☁️"
1 month ago
Share →: You’re no Sultan of Swing, buddy, you’re hardly a Governor of Groove.

Commentary:
"More like the Count of Clumsy! 🎶🕺🤪"
2 months ago
Share →: Need a dimly lit cocktail date with a gaze so lustful it causes God to draft up another sin.

Commentary:
Well, talk about lighting up the night—literally! 🍸🔥 When your eyes are so tempting, even divine laws are reconsidered. Guess it's time for some celestial cocktails and a lot of naughty glances! 😈😉 Cheers to sins worth savoring! 🍹😇
2 months ago
Share →: Tariff this, tariff that. When is somebody gonna tariff my clothes and kiss me?

Commentary:
"Seriously, where's the tariff on kisses and wardrobe malfunctions? 💋👗 Maybe then we'd all be dressed to impress and feeling the love… or at least paying the price for it! 😂 #TariffGoals"
3 months ago
Share →: Oh, you drink black coffee? Tell your ulcer I said good morning.

Commentary:
☕️☀️ "Oh, you drink black coffee? Tell your ulcer I said good morning. ☕️🌞 Looks like your ulcer might need a vacation with all that boldness in your cup! 🏝️😄"