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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

Even worse than a spider is a spider that just disappeared.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

I thought Game of Thrones was a pooping contest for men.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

Somethіng wrong іn your lіfe? There’s a nap for that.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

I’d be less aggressive in the morning if I could drive to work in a tank.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

I wish people would stop holding back and use social media to tell us how they really feel.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

I tried meowing back at the cat to show him I was making an effort, but he just switched to English.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Humanity was engineered as a biological weapon but left abandoned early in its development.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

Your password must contain a character… with a tragic backstory.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

If you inject Botox into a raisin, does it turn back into a grape?

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

First date idea: Couples Colonoscopies.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

796 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,958

Funny Quotes Topics

13,929

Funny Quotes Images

10,958

29 minutes ago

3,435

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WhatsApp:

The sexual tension between my tendency to do something stupid and my resolve not to.

Just shared via Slack:

I just need a little time to warm up to you, and then I’ll be super fun, I promise—1-2 years at most.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Why are people always so scared of self-checkouts when shopping? It’s much quicker and you always get something for free.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

My IQ used to be higher than my weight, but now I’m fat and dumb.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Me: I’m an introvert. Vodka: No, you’re not.

Just shared via Pinterest:

No one is more surprised than my kids every night when I say it’s bed time.

Live now on Twitch:

My bad habits got renewed for another season.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Descibe your boobs only using a picture of them.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

I cheat on my taxes by sleeping with other people’s taxes.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I’m always in a rush to go home, and do absolutely nothing.

Home » Funny Humorist Quotes

25 Funny humorist quotes

Funny humorist quotes 😂 are the perfect way to brighten your day and tickle your funny bone! Whether you need a quick laugh or a clever twist on everyday life, these witty gems 💡 will have you grinning from ear to ear. Ready to add some humor 🎉 and sparkle ✨ to your feed? Dive in and let the chuckles begin!

New funny humorist quotes 👇

4 days ago
Share →: When you’re sad, find two equally sad friends and form a cryangle.

Commentary:
Forming a cryangle: where misery loves company and geometry gets emotional 😂🔺💧
6 days ago
Share →: If at first you don’t succeed, the internet will let you know immediately.

Commentary:
Oops! The internet's our biggest cheerleader… in reverse! 😂📉👊
7 days ago
Share →: ‘Another bombshell has entered the villa!’ I say to myself as I walk in the front door of my own home.

Commentary:
Guess who just dropped the mic at the front door? 🎤🚪💥
7 days ago
Share →: My girlfriend treats me like a god. She ignores my existence and only talks to me when she needs something.

Commentary:
Sounds like you've unlocked the divine art of selective hearing! 🙉✨
1 week ago
Share →: Yogurts should come in a five-pack, not a four-pack, or make the workweek four days.

Commentary:
Four yogurts or four-day weeks: one must crumble to chaos to restore balance! 🥴🍦📅✨
1 week ago
Share →: Asking my dentist a question, but sticking my fingers in his mouth before he replies.

Commentary:
Taking "open wide and say ahh" to a whole new level! 😂🦷🤐
1 week ago
Share →: My family asked me what I wanted for Mother’s Day, so I packed their bags and changed the locks.

Commentary:
Looks like someone finally found the perfect recipe for peace and quiet this Mother's Day! 🔑🚪😂
1 week ago
Share →: More often than not, I read applause as applesauce.

Commentary:
Clapping or snacking? Either way, I'm a fan! 👏🍎😄
1 week ago
Share →: I assume people who bookmark my posts are building a case against me.

Commentary:
"Note to self: stop writing my autobiography in meme format! 📚😂🔍"
1 week ago
Share →: I’d post more pics, but I don’t want y’all falling in love all at once.

Commentary:
"Careful, folks! This feed is officially a no-fall zone! 😂📸💕"

For even more funny humorist quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny humorist quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

796 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,958

Funny Quotes Topics

13,929

Funny Quotes Images

10,958

29 minutes ago

3,436

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

Any time I have ever uttered the phrase “no worries” I have been lying. There are many worries.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

Sometimes my toddler throws stuff on the floor and then shouts “OH NO” and that’s kind of like what politicians do.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

I get real disrespectful with serving sizes. A bag is not gonna tell me what to do.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

Most men will receive their first bunch of flowers at their funeral.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

Nature is fascinating. A dandelion makes it through concrete, while I get my head stuck in my sweater in the morning.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

Establish dominance by showing up with all your childhood trophies.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

“Do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.” Yeah, because I won’t be leaving my bed.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

In the American Bible, Eve was made from part of a McRib.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

I hate when people call my phone! I don’t use it for that.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

I believe in you. I also believe in Bigfoot so don’t get too excited.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WeChat:

Don’t let anyone tell you, you can’t do something. Show them you can’t.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

There is sex without love, there is love without sex, and there is me without both.

Trending via Reddit:

I’m at an age where, when I’m tying my shoes, I think about what else I can do while I’m down here.

Just landed via Messenger:

I hate to brag, but I’ve been the biggest mistake of numerous people’s lives.

Making waves on Snapchat:

At this point, Tom Cruise is a stuntman who does his own acting.

Trending via Slack:

If someone asks you why you’re single, just answer with: “Got lucky.”

Trending via Facebook:

I’m no doctor but I’m pretty sure this Santa-shaped chocolate oughta settle my stomach.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Why do moths eat sweaters? Have they tried sandwiches or avocados?

Just shared via WeChat:

The Bachelor is like “Meet Savannah from Brooklyn, Madison from Savannah, Brooklyn from Madison”

Seen just now on Snapchat:

“I need a movie where the villain actually won!” Have you tried watching the news?

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