92 Funny lifestyle quotes

More funny lifestyle quotes 👇

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  5 months ago

  View →: Rich people don’t put their couches against their wall. I moved my couch into the middle of the floor and still haven’t gotten rich. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong here.
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  5 months ago

  View →: I’m currently trying not to read anything about carbohydrates after 4pm.
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  5 months ago

  View →: If I’d married a wealthier man, I’d be lying on a fancier couch right now refusing to clean bigger rooms.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Seven wives and no alcohol? No thanks, Mormons.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Just saw two identical twins out in public together. No disrespect to that lifestyle but please keep it private.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Eating fast food shouldn’t count for calories because it’s not around long enough.
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  5 months ago

  View →: I’ve started taking a brisk walk straight after dinner and it’s saving me an absolute fortune on restaurant bills.
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  5 months ago

  View →: UK rappers be like “I’ve got a posh flat and my bird is very comely, I own more motors than the marchioness of cholmondeley”
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  5 months ago

  View →: If you eat well and exercise, you’ll die fit.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Being single allows you to do a lot of things. For example, standing naked in the kitchen at night and eating cold pizza.
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  5 months ago

  View →: People think I’m a minimalist, but I’m just broke.
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  5 months ago

  View →: In my 20’s: why is eating healthy such a big deal anyways. In my 40’s: oh.
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  5 months ago

  View →: The secret to work life balance is generational wealth.
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  5 months ago

  View →: When you drink red wine from a cup, it looks like fruit tea and you are also admired by others for your healthy lifestyle.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Give it to me straight, doc, what can I do to be healthier besides changing my entire lifestyle?
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  5 months ago

  View →: The best way for me to stick to my diet is to go straight back to sleep after breakfast.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Diet tip: Your pants can’t get too tight if you never wear any.
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  5 months ago

  View →: I aspire to be a stay-at-home mom with no kids.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Everybody loves that comfort food until you end up with that comfort body.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Could you even imagine the crime rate if no one drank coffee or ate bacon.
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  5 months ago

  View →: I need to eat healthier but donuts exist.
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  5 months ago

  View →: I could never be in the mafia, those guys stay up way to late.
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  5 months ago

  View →: I don’t drink blood to stay young. I do it mainly for the lifestyle.
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  5 months ago

  View →: If food delivery apps had never been invented, I would either be wildly rich or dead.
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  5 months ago

  View →: I’m at the “buy bigger jeans” part of my Eat. Pray. Love. journey.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Everyone is posting their vacation pictures and I’m like… I went shopping.
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  5 months ago

  View →: People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.
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  5 months ago

  View →: I woke up deciding to incorporate the parkour lifestyle into my daily life then reconsidered as I fell over again putting my jeans on.
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  5 months ago

  View →: My sleeping pattern isn’t even a pattern anymore. It’s a lifestyle.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Gosh, being a princess is exhausting.

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