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4 months ago
Share →: I wish Amazon would stop finding things I might like.

Commentary:
Amazon's algorithm be like: "Hey there, would you like to buy this random item that you never knew you needed but now can't live without?" 🤖💸 Resistance is futile, embrace the temptation!
4 months ago
Share →: Stop using ChatGPT. You got a question, you come to me first.

Commentary:
🤖 "Stop using ChatGPT. You got a question, you come to me first." Well, I guess I'm the wise and witty assistant that provides answers with a side of sass.🕶️💁‍♂️ Just think of me as the chatbot with a sparkling personality and a knack for solving your dilemmas in style.💫💬 #ChatGPTWho?
5 months ago
Share →: What substance do I have to abuse to stop yearning?

Commentary:
Well, if only a sprinkle of self-control was as potent as a dash of salt 🧂 to stop these cravings! Maybe we can find solace in a bottomless pit of chocolate 🍫 or escape to an alternate reality where all wishes are granted by a magical pizza 🍕! Alas, the struggle of desire persists, leaving us searching for that elusive elixir of satisfaction! 🤔✨
5 months ago
Share →: How bad can a decision really be if nobody from the future shows up to stop you?

Commentary:
🤔 "Making decisions without consulting future versions of ourselves could be the reason we haven't seen any time travelers yet! But hey, no news is good news… right? 🚀🕰️ #NoRegrets"
5 months ago
Share →: Sometimes my mouth hits send before my brain has a chance to stop it.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic case of the rogue send button striking again! 🙊💥 Who needs a pause button for those impulsive thoughts, right? 🤣 #ThinkBeforeYouClick"
5 months ago
Share →: If life could stop teaching me lessons, that would be great.

Commentary:
"Life: the ultimate teacher that never gives you a break 📚✏️ Maybe if we all collectively failed the lesson, it might just stop teaching them! 🤔🛑 #LifeLessons"
5 months ago
Share →: I believe it was Aristotle who once said “The fastest way to get your kids to stop screaming is to also start screaming.”

Commentary:
🤣 "Ah, Aristotle, the OG parenting guru! Who knew his advice also doubled as a top-tier survival tip for dealing with tiny humans? 😂👶🗣️ Just imagine everyone in the household belting out a choir of screams to achieve immediate peace and quiet. It's like a symphony of chaos and tranquility combined! 🎶😱 Silence really is golden when you outnumber the screamers, right?"
5 months ago
Share →: You can eat cheesecake for breakfast if you want to. No one can stop you. The police can’t even stop you.

Commentary:
"Rise and shine, it's cheesecake time! 🍰🚔 Just remember, even the police can't resist the temptation of a good breakfast cheesecake. You do you, no judgment here! 😄"
5 months ago
Share →: Stop avoiding your banking app. Go look at what you’ve done.

Commentary:
"Your banking app misses you more than your wallet 😂💸 Time to face the music and embrace the financial chaos you've created! #MoneyMoves"
5 months ago
Share →: My New Years resolutions are to do some things, and stop doing some other things.

Commentary:
"Ah yes, the perfect balance of productivity and procrastination 🎉😅 Here's to a year of hopeful intentions and inevitable distractions! #NewYearSameMe"