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20 Funny under quotes

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  • I was actually about to do a workout when the couch threw itself protectively under me.

    Commentary:
    “Looks like the couch is on a mission to save you from the evil clutches of exercise! 🦸‍♂️💪 Who needs a workout when you have a trusty couch sidekick ready to defend you at all costs? 😂🛋️ #CouchPotatoForLife”

  • I’ve never seen anything sadder than me in a black cape under the salon lights with wet hair parted incorrectly by a solid inch.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the tragic saga of the cape-clad, wet-haired warrior! A tale of misaligned parts and salon woes unfold beneath the harsh fluorescent lights. The struggle is real, my friends. May your hair find its way and your cape flutter in triumph! 💇‍♀️✨ #HairitageChronicles”

  • “AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI get absolutely no work done and then throw their coworker under the bus as soon as their boss asks about it.

    Commentary:
    Looks like AI is mastering the art of human behavior too well! 🤖👔 Don’t worry though, they’re still working on perfecting the classic “blame game” technique just like a regular office worker! 🤣🚌 #AIvsHumans #WorkplaceDrama

  • An eye exam where the optometrist makes you read a menu under dim lights.

    Commentary:
    “Trying to read a menu at a dimly lit restaurant, or just getting an eye exam? 🕶️🔦 Talk about a fine line between ordering pasta and checking your vision! Who knew squinting could become a gourmet experience 🍝😂 #EyeStrainMenuGain”

  • If I were Juliet, I would NOT be pleased to find a man standing under my balcony at midnight. Sir, I am in my jim-jams.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the timeless tale of Romeo and Juliet takes a modern twist! 🌹🌙 Who needs a knight in shining armor when you can have a man in jim-jams under your balcony? 😂 #ModernRomance”

  • My favorite 90s skill: Uninstalling my car stereo and hiding it in my glove box in under 15 seconds.

    Commentary:
    Ah, the nineties – where car stereo theft was a competitive sport! 🚗💿 Well, that’s one way to outsmart those sticky-fingered thieves! Because why break into your car when there’s nothing worth stealing but the glove box itself? 🤣🔊 #NinetiesHacks

  • My husband pissed me off so I wrapped his remote and put it under the tree.

    Commentary:
    Looks like someone found the perfect gift-wrapping solution for their husband’s misdeeds! 🎁🌲 Who needs reindeer games when you’ve got remote control revenge tactics? 😆 #HolidayPranks #RelationshipGoals

    Fun Fact or Trivia:
    Did you know that the tradition of hanging stockings by the fireplace comes from a legend about Saint Nicholas? 🧦🔥 Legend has it that he gave gold coins to three sisters by dropping them down the chimney, and they landed in stockings that were hung to dry.

  • I’ve never seen a McDonald’s or a Burger King under construction. They just show up.

    Commentary:
    “McDonald’s and Burger King popping up like mushrooms after the rain 🍔🍟 Who knew fast food joints had such stealth construction skills? Maybe they use a ‘secret sauce’ for building permits! 😂”

  • Not many quicksand-related deaths since the 1970s. Thank God the authorities got that nightmare under control.

    Commentary:
    Looks like quicksand finally got a grip on itself and thought, “Maybe drowning people isn’t the way to go.” 😅🌪️ Thank goodness for those authorities – saving lives and boots one step at a time! 🙌🏻👢 #RIPQuicksandVictims

  • Welcome to your 40s, you now don’t understand a single word anyone under 25 is saying.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the delightful confusion of hitting your 40s! Suddenly, it feels like everyone under 25 is speaking a different language 🤯🤷‍♂️ It’s like tuning into a radio station and realizing you’re on the wrong frequency 📻🤣 Embrace the ‘lost in translation’ moments and just nod along like a wise sage 😉🧐”

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