Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

I take offense when people don’t invite me to events l’d like to turn down.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

And to my children I leave my collection of tote bags and gift bags.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

I hate everyone in front of me at this checkout line, everyone behind me is cool.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

Golf would be more exciting to watch if they played naked.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

I caught two kids smoking pot outside my office. Fifteen minutes later, my boss caught me and two kids smoking pot outside my office.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Men be like “I hate drama,” and then have love triangles, secret babies, a wife, side chick, ex that’s still around, breadcrumbs, and unhealed trauma.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

If you start a sentence with “Let me reiterate…”, I’m gonna ignore it the second time too.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

The plan was simple: finish school, find a job and get married at 25. But now I don’t understand anything anymore.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

I don’t understand the phrase “You can’t have your cake and eat it” because if I have cake, what the hell else am I supposed to do with it.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

A delivery driver just asked for my date of birth. I said, “94.” He replied, “Is that 1994?” Oh, sorry mate, no. My bad, that was 1794. Right around the French Revolution.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

508 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,101

Funny Quotes Topics

17,252

Funny Quotes Images

15,101

Updated

Dec 23, 2025

Users Online

3,690

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WhatsApp:

Oh no, we don’t go in there. That room belongs to the spiders.

Live now on Twitch:

I admire the audacity of beavers, they just move to a new area and say “screw the neighbors, imma put a lake here”.

Trending via Pinterest:

I am calling on public libraries to ban the books that I borrowed and lost. We don’t need that kind of crap in the libraries.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

And to my children, I leave 127 open tabs on Safari.

Trending via Snapchat:

No, I mean, it’s great toast. I just didn’t expect it to be French.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you’re shopping for something else because they just won’t budge.

Seen just now on Telegram:

There are 400 billion stars in our galaxy and perhaps two trillion galaxies in total, and I just wonder if Miss Universe fully understands her achievement.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

I got confused by all the yard signs, and I think I may have voted for a realtor.

Social Media Stars ⭐

24 shares on Pinterest this month:

Every group chat has that one person who never replies, and it’s me.

51 shares on Reddit this month:

Stay humble, you are someone’s weird coworker.

89 shares on Slack this month:

New challenge called “don’t say ‘wow it’s already dark by five these days’ for the rest of winter”

14 shares on TikTok this month:

Look away from your laptop for 1 second, and MS Teams will say you left the country.

10 shares on X this month:

Dating apps never work for me because I need at least two years of friendship charged with weird sexual tension to even consider falling in love.

52 shares on YouTube this month:

Not to brag but I always pick the slowest moving checkout line at the grocery store.

41 shares on Discord this month:

Life can be so beautiful, you just can’t get sober.

100 shares on YouTube this month:

Notice how Lorde has a song called “Tennis Court” and not “Pickleball Court”? Tired of y’all pushing that fake sport.

74 shares on Facebook this month:

Petition to allow customer service employees to fight at least one customer per day.

17 shares on Snapchat this month:

I once let a really short guy be the big spoon and it felt like I went to bed with a backpack on.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

What part of “hiii” do you not get? I’m in love with you.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

Apparently, “spite” is not an appropriate answer to “What motivates you?”

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

Don’t let the British accent fool you. I’m not saying anything smart.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

Breaking news: you’re way less interesting than you think you are.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

The economy’s so tough, people out here eating grass — matcha.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

I just went to Crazy Town, and they said you’re a local legend.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

I get so crabby when strangers waste my time which is unfair to them because I waste almost all of my own time to begin with.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

Fellas, be sure to never ask a lady any questions on a date. This makes them feel interrogated. Strong declarative statements only.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

The goth urge to live in a haunted Victorian estate and be feared by the townspeople.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

Fact: Snow in November happens because people decorate for Christmas prematurely. You know who you are. Stop it.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Discord:

What I’m trying to say is, “Hello, here’s my entire heart and all of my devotion.”

Spotted on Reddit:

I wonder if this is all happening because I opened that umbrella inside.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I’m getting to the age where it’s rude to pull out a bottle of ibuprofen if I don’t have enough for everyone.

Just landed via Reddit:

By 30, you should have settled down with an addiction that works for your lifestyle, no second guessing. You go to work, come home, and [addiction].

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Laziness is the mother of all bad habits, but ultimately she is a mother, and we should respect her.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

The way some people hold their cell phone to make a call, I always think they’re trying to take a bite out of a sandwich.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

It’s like my wish isn’t even your command anymore…

Just shared via Discord:

Liking someone who likes you back is probably really good for your mental health.

Making waves on Discord:

All the world’s a stage, and I always forget my line.

Just landed via TikTok:

Donuts have holes in them, just like acoustic guitars, but that’s pretty much where the similarities end.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

Every time I leave the house, I’m reminded why sweatpants exist.

All strapless bras need to be taken off the shelves. A total recall. We do not have the technology yet.

One day my sanity went out for smokes and never came back.

Had the bed all to myself last night, so you know what that means… I slept in a slightly different spot, and now my neck feels weird.

Relationship status: the black mold in my shower thinks I’m cute.

Just got revenge on someone who wronged me many, many years ago. Never relax, I’m coming.

Putting a baby on board sticker on my car because other drivers have a right to know who they’re dealing with behind the wheel.

I exaggerated on my job application and said I wanted to work for a living.

I have an addiction to pattern recognition.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨