The best way to enjoy your tea while the world is falling apart around you is to remember that the world has always been falling apart around you.

The best way to enjoy your tea while the world is falling apart around you is to remember that the world has always been falling apart around you.

Commentary:
Sip your tea, darling ☕️🌍 Just remember, chaos is a constant. So why not enjoy a cuppa amidst the madness? It's the small moments of tranquility that keep us sane in this wacky world! 😜 #TeaTimeCuresAll

Just did my best horse impression and the doctor still won’t give me ketamine.

Just did my best horse impression and the doctor still won’t give me ketamine.

Commentary:
"Looks like the doctor wasn't horsin' around when it comes to prescribing ketamine! 🐴💉 Maybe try neighing for a second opinion? 🤣 #DoctorIsNotBuyingIt"

The best time to visit Japan is when you have money!

The best time to visit Japan is when you have money!

Commentary:
"Visiting Japan is like playing a real-life game of 'Mario Kart' – it's only fun when you have enough coins to fuel your adventure! 🇯🇵💰 Just remember to avoid any banana peels on the path to financial bliss in the Land of the Rising Sun!"

Two of the best things in life are laughing and orgasms. I want to make you do both a lot.

Two of the best things in life are laughing and orgasms. I want to make you do both a lot.

Commentary:
"Whoever said you can't have it all clearly hasn't met me 😏 Let's aim for a life filled with laughter and pleasure – it's all about that good vibe energy! 😂💥 #FunnyQuotes #LifeGoals"

Gonna run this by my two best friends who are as insane as I am.

Gonna run this by my two best friends who are as insane as I am.

Commentary:
"Consulting with your partners in crime, a.k.a. your partners in craziness! 😜🤪 Can't make important decisions without the approval of your fellow lunatics, am I right? 🤣"

Showers are the best places to lose arguments with yourself.

Showers are the best places to lose arguments with yourself.

Commentary:
"Who knew that shampoo and deep contemplation could be such fierce opponents in the battle of self-doubt? 🚿🤔 It's hard to stay victorious when your thoughts keep outsmarting you in the bathroom arena!"

The best thing about driving in the snow is staying home.

The best thing about driving in the snow is staying home.

Commentary:
"Who needs a winter wonderland when you can have a cozy blanket fort and a warm cup of cocoa instead? ☃️❄️ Stay safe and snuggled up this season, folks! 🚗🏠"

Don’t date coworkers. Being the hot coworker nobody at work has a chance with is always the best role to play.

Don’t date coworkers. Being the hot coworker nobody at work has a chance with is always the best role to play.

Commentary:
"Who needs office drama when you can be the untouchable hotshot turning heads and filing reports like a boss 💁‍♂️🔥 Remember, it's all fun and games until someone spills coffee on the copier! ☕️😂 #workplacepowerplay"

Mario Kart turned out to be the best training for winter driving.

Mario Kart turned out to be the best training for winter driving.

Commentary:
"Who knew dodging banana peels and blue shells would prepare you for slipping on icy roads and navigating snow-covered streets? 🍌❄️ Drive safely out there, and remember – always blame the slippery road, not your unimpressive drifting skills! 🚗💨"

“Winter is literally the best season.” Okay, husky, go sit outside then.

“Winter is literally the best season.” Okay, husky, go sit outside then.

Commentary:
Oh, so winter is the best season, huh? 🌨️❄️ Sure thing, husky, go enjoy the frosty delights outside! Hope you've got your fur coat and earmuffs ready! 🐾🐕 #WinterWonderland #ChillyHusky