57 Funny breakup quotes

• All these self-driving vehicles… It’s only a matter of time before we hear a country song about his truck leaving him.

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  2 weeks ago

  before, breakup, country, country song, hear, humor, leaving, matter, only, self-driving, self-driving vehicle, song, time, truck, vehicle

• If we breakup because you “wanna focus on school,” I better see you in Harvard.

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  3 weeks ago

  better, breakup, education, focus, Harvard, humor, i, relationship, school

• My dad told my sister’s new boyfriend to stand at the end of the picture so he can crop him out whenever she dumps him.

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  3 weeks ago

  boyfriend, breakup, crop, dad, end, family, humor, joke, new, photo, picture, sister, stand, told, whenever

• Printers and computers treat each other like they broke up the night before, and you’re their mutual friend.

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  1 month ago

  before, breakup, broke, communication, computer, computers, friend, friendship, humor, mutual, mutual friend, night, printer, printers, relationship, technology, treat

• If you ghosted me, don’t come back. Maintain that energy, babe. Stay dead.

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  1 month ago

  babe, back, breakup, comeback, dating, dead, energy, ghost, ghosted, ghosting, humor, me, relationship, sarcasm, stay

• You don’t really see women throwing their boyfriend’s stuff out the window anymore.

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  2 months ago

  boyfriend, breakup, humor, relationship, stuff, throw, throwing, window, woman, women

• Word on the street is that the fire in your heart is out.

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  2 months ago

  breakup, emotion, fire, heart, humor, joke, relationship, rumor, sarcasm, street, word

• Your ex is probably in a relationship, thinking about you.

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  2 months ago

  breakup, ex, humor, jealousy, love, relationship, sarcasm, thinking

• Dating again after you break up with a long-term partner is like dying in a video game and ending up back at the start to do it all again, except with less health.

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  2 months ago

  after, again, back, break, breakup, dating, dying, ending, except, game, health, humor, less, long-term, long-term relationship, partner, relationship, relationship struggle, restart, start, struggle, video, video game

• There’s no post-breakup healing process for girls. You just wake up one day and be like, “Ew,” and you’re free.

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  2 months ago

  breakup, day, free, freedom, girl, girls, healing, humor, just, process, recovery, relationship, wake

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