27 Funny case quotes

• Bro, you’re not allowed anymore to have your tongue drop out of your mouth and form a stair case when you see my wife.

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  2 weeks ago

  bro, case, drop, form, funny observation, humor, jealousy, mouth, observation, relationship, stair, staircase, tongue, wife

• Sometimes I feel like I’m cheating on my recliner with my loveseat, in case you were wondering how emotionally invested I am in laziness.

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  2 weeks ago

  am, case, cheating, comfort, emotionally, emotionally invested, feel, furniture, humor, i, invested, laziness, loveseat, recliner, relaxation, sometimes, wondering

• Deleted old Tweets just in case I date a very famous woman with rabid fans.

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  2 weeks ago

  case, date, deleted, famous, famous woman, fans, humor, i, just, media, old, privacy, rabid, relationship, social, social media, Tweets, woman

• My life advice is always the same. Wait for karma, but take up kickboxing, just in case.

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  2 weeks ago

  advice, always, case, fitness, humor, just, karma, kickboxing, life, life advice, preparedness, same, self-defense, take, wait

• I just turned on my car’s seat warmer to keep my burrito warm in case you wondered what I was up to.

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  2 weeks ago

  burrito, car, cars, case, cooking, driving, food, humor, i, just, keep, multitasking, seat, seat warmer, warm, warmer, warming

• For security reasons, I highly recommend that you leave one of your children home during the holidays to set elaborate booby traps in case of intruders.

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  2 weeks ago

  booby, case, children, home, i, leave, reasons, recommend, security, set

• A designated hitter in baseball is the one who has to hit for everyone in case the team is drunk.

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  2 weeks ago

  baseball, case, designated, designated hitter, drunk, everyone, hit, hitter, humor, sports, sports humor, team

• Valentine’s Day is a stupid and made up holiday unless someone wants to give me a present in which case I really believe in celebrating it.

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  3 weeks ago

  believe, case, celebrate, day, gift, give, holiday, humor, i, irony, love, me, present, relationship, someone, stupid, valentine’s, Valentine’s Day

• In case any nudes of me should appear somewhere: It was very cold that day.

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  3 weeks ago

  case, cold, context, day, embarrassment, humor, me, nude, nudes, self-deprecation, should

• If a stranger starts talking to me in an elevator I say “I don’t want to talk in case we get stuck and I have to eat you” that usually shuts them up.

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  3 weeks ago

  awkward, case, conversation, eat, elevator, humor, i, joke, me, say, shut, shut up, stranger, survival, talk, talking, want

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