25 Funny common quotes

• I really thought impromptu dance-offs were going to be more common.

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  6 days ago

  common, dance-off, expectation, going, humor, i, impromptu, interaction, social, social interaction, thought

• When I die and y’all go through my search history, you’ll be disappointed to find mostly just definitions for very common words that I wasn’t sure I was using correctly.

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  6 days ago

  common, death, definition, die, disappointed, disappointment, history, humor, i, just, language, misunderstanding, search, search history, sure, through, using, word, words

• Bears and worms have almost nothing in common. But gummy bears and gummy worms? Very similar.

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  7 days ago

  almost, bear, bears, candy, common, comparison, funny observation, gummy, gummy bear, gummy worm, humor, nothing, observation, worm

• My whole life, I never read a warning label telling me not to eat laundry detergent or put glue in my hair, somehow I just knew.

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  1 week ago

  common, common sense, detergent, eat, glue, hair, humor, i, just, label, laundry, laundry detergent, lesson, life, life lesson, me, never, put, read, sense, telling, warning, warning label, whole

• Common sense isn’t a gift. It’s a punishment, because you have to deal with everyone who doesn’t have it.

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  1 week ago

  common, common sense, deal, dealing, dealing with people, everyone, gift, humor, people, punishment, sarcasm, sense

• My toxic trait is that I expect people to have common sense, and I get mad when they don’t.

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  1 week ago

  behavior, common, common sense, expectation, frustration, humor, i, mad, people, personality, sense, social, social behavior, toxic, toxic trait, trait

• The Scream movies were believable in the ’90s, but no one with any common sense answers unknown numbers on their phones anymore.

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  1 week ago

  90s, call, common, common sense, etiquette, horror, horror movy, humor, modern, modern technology, movy, number, numbers, phone, phone call, phone etiquette, phones, scream, sense, technology, unknown, unknown number

• The number of times I stand in a room, staring because I forgot why I walked in there, is embarrassingly high.

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  1 week ago

  activity, blank, common, common experience, confusion, embarrassment, experience, forgetfulness, forgot, high, i, indoor, indoor activity, memory, mind, mind blank, number, room, stand, staring, times, why

• Parallel lines have got so much in common, it’s a shame they’ll never meet.

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  1 week ago

  common, geometry, humor, irony, line, mathematics, meet, parallel, parallel line, shame

• I have a lot in common with AI. We occasionally provide incorrect information with a confident tone.

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  1 week ago

  AI, common, comparison, confidence, confident, humor, i, incorrect, incorrect information, information, lot, occasionally, technology, tone

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