115 Funny everything quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: December. The month at work where everything is January’s problem.

  Commentary:
  Ah, December – the month where procrastination thrives and responsibility takes a holiday break, leaving poor January to clean up the mess like the designated driver at the office party 🎉🤷‍♂️ Don't worry, January, we promise to start working on that New Year's resolution…in February! 📆🙈 #JustDecemberThings

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Your car antlers tell me everything I need to know about you.

  Commentary:
  Oh dear, looks like those car antlers have revealed your reindeer aspirations! 🦌🚗 Maybe it's time to sleigh the holiday spirit all year round! 😉 #ReindeerInDisguise

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Who needs therapy when you can gaslight yourself into thinking that everything is fine?

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the magical power of self-deception! 🤪💫 Who needs therapy when your inner gaslighter is up for the challenge? Just keep nodding along with your delusions and soon enough, your chaos will be mistaken for peace! 🌪️✨ #TheArtOfGaslightingYourself"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Kinda lame that pretending everything is fine isn’t working.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic 'fake it till you make it' strategy falling flat? 😅 Sounds like someone forgot to include some glitter and unicorn magic in the mix! 🦄✨ Time to swap out that facade for some real talk and maybe a sprinkle of actually dealing with it. You got this! 💪 #KeepingItReal"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Life is strange. We come into the world with nothing, then we struggle for everything, and finally, we leave with nothing.

  Commentary:
  "Life: the ultimate 'renter,' no security deposit, no furniture, just trying to make it work with a bunch of borrowed stuff. 🌍💸 #LifeIsALeasingAgreement"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: My favorite things about Twitter are that everything you read is true, everyone is nice, and all intentions are pure of heart.

  Commentary:
  Ah, Twitter – the magical land of 🌈unicorns and 🌟rainbows, where facts are as solid as a marshmallow and kindness flows like a river of emojis. Remember, in this enchanted realm, even the trolls have hearts of gold! ✨💖🦄 #KeepingItRealOnTwitter

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Stop blaming everyone for all of your problems. Pick the one person you really hate and blame them for everything.

  Commentary:
  "Stop playing the blame game with everyone and their grandma! 🙄 Instead, channel your inner drama llama and pick that one special person you absolutely love to hate and let the blame fest begin! Just remember, it's all fun and games until karma shows up for a tea party! ☕️😏"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: When you’re a snowman, everything smells like a carrot.

  Commentary:
  "Being a snowman must be a real nose-tingling experience! 🥕❄️ Just imagine, the world smells like a delicious carrot all day, every day. It's a rough life for those frosty fellas, but at least they never have to worry about getting hangry! ⛄😋"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Which is it, brain? Does nothing matter or do I need to be anxious about everything?

  Commentary:
  Ah, the eternal struggle of our complex brains – caught between apathy and anxiety! 🤔💭 It's like we're starring in a never-ending sitcom called "The Mind Games." 😂 #Overthinking101 🧠🙈

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Don’t tell me that everything was better in the past. I was there.

  Commentary:
  "Please don't try and pull the nostalgia card on me. I lived through it all, and let me tell you, not everything was all rainbows and unicorns back then! 🌈🦄 #BeenThereDoneThat"

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